It's hard to do nothing because you tend to do something and then you have to drop everything. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
The peak of being a fan is a hotdog and a beer and a seat at the game. There's nothing above that.… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Twitter is good. Why say a lot to a few people when you can say virtually nothing to everyone? — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Having a 2 year old is like having a blender that you don't have the top for. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
After you get a job and before you have to do it. Nothing beats that. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers? — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
The greatest Jewish tradition is to laugh. The cornerstone of Jewish survival has always been to find humor in life and in… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Did you know that the original title for War and Peace was War, What Is It Good For? — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
There is nothing more rewarding than completing a goal you have set for yourself. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Dating is pressure and tension. What is a date, really, but a job interview that lasts all night? — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Work is the least important thing and family is the most important. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
People don't just bump into each other and have sex. This isn't Cinemax. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
“we are all trying to get to the same island, whether you swim, fly, surf or skydiving. What matters is when the… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
We’re all trying to get to the same island, whether you swim, fly, surf, or skydive in, it doesn’t matter. What matters is when… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I have a nice bookshelf in my office, but not my house. I'm crass, but not that crass. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
There's no downside to fame and people who whine about it make me sick. It's the greatest thing in the world. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
We're all trying to get to the same island — whether you swim, fly, surf, or skydive, it doesn't matter. What matters is when… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication...Not easy. There's an entire wall of products you need.… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I went up to the camp and Paul had me eat my first oyster I had never had an oyster in my life. And… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
Then, finally, the third year, begging the parents, I got the Superman Halloween costume. Cardboard box, self-made top, mask included. Remember the rubber band… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
This is really a crazy idea, you know. It probably won't work, but that will be interesting, too. You have to motivate yourself with… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
If you get something right, you really feel it, right in your chest, on stage. I think it's an incomparable experience. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
People have an infinite attention span if you are entertaining them. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
It's hard to do nothing because you tend to do something and then you have to drop everything. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
