Green Monk

I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy saving mode.

— Green Monk

The best things in life are other people's.

— Green Monk

HIStory: Because HERstory would just be gossip.

— Green Monk

I'm ready for love in all the wrong places.

— Green Monk

Tweet the tweet you want to retweet.

— Green Monk

Detours are just cockblockers for cars.

— Green Monk

Pedophiles are immature.

— Green Monk

If money doesn't change you, you're an idiot.

— Green Monk

My room is Not Dirty !! I just have everything on display ; it's like having my own Museum...

— Green Monk

Stop checking your phone nobody loves you! - me at the cinema to anyone checking their phone

— Green Monk

I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs.

— Green Monk

Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects

— Green Monk

I'm so handsome that every time I shop, the cashiers check me out!

— Green Monk

A real man ends a relationship before he starts searching for another one.

— Green Monk

Trust is something that you have in a condom when the partner is not your spouse

— Green Monk

Set Your Goals High Enough To Inspire You And Low Enough To Encourage You

— Green Monk

When a human being trips I laugh at them. When I drop my phone my heart skips a beat. That sums up…

— Green Monk

Its really so funny that people who treat me like shit get offended when me finally do the same to them.

— Green Monk

Dogs are tough. I've been interrogating this one for hours and he still won't tell me who is a good boy.

— Green Monk

Arranged Marriages: All your life you are expected not to talk to strangers and all of sudden you are expected to sleep…

— Green Monk

Women say porn sites portray an unrealistic image of their beauty therefore making them feel inadequate. And then they buy 12 inch dildos.

— Green Monk

Women make me happy. Once accepting that I will never be able to understand them makes me more happier.

— Green Monk

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

— Green Monk

Its a funny thing that when a man hasnt anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.

— Green Monk

Less interactions, less distractions.

— Green Monk

Alright. I'm shamed. You can stop pointing.

— Green Monk

The greatest thing to fear is ourselves.

— Green Monk

Nerd? I prefer the term Intellectual Badass!

— Green Monk

Girls are suckers when it comes to cocks.

— Green Monk

How dare you ignore me ignoring you.

— Green Monk

A steak pun is a rare medium well done.

— Green Monk

Most people are most people.

— Green Monk

My greatest achievement is my huge failure.

— Green Monk

Curiousity killed your virginity ..

— Green Monk

I'm remotely attracted to televisions.

— Green Monk

Keep your selfie to your selfie.

— Green Monk

Bitch, I tweet like everyone hates me.

— Green Monk

I wish my marriage had autocorrect.

— Green Monk

People with pierced nipples have no excuse for losing their keys.

— Green Monk

I could lose so much weight if I just switched to red wine from eight beers.

— Green Monk