I call masturbating “Gregging,” named not after a man…

It's only the losers named 'Dave' that think having an unusual name is bad, and who cares what they think? They're named 'Dave.'

— Penn Jillette

“I’d love to work with an Asian guy named Wu Hu, because just saying his name would get me all pumped up and excited.”

— Jarod Kintz

I want to meet a guy named Art. I'd take him to a museum, hang him on the wall, criticize him, and leave.

— Jarod Kintz

“Met a guy named Bill once. We met in Williamsburg and discussed the Bill of Rights and duck’s beaks.”

— Jarod Kintz

“What kind of name is Siler-Spence? I mean, what's wrong with these women who use hyphens? What if her name was Skowinski and she…

— John Grisham

Dr. Okun. Who's named after a special-effects guy named Jeff Okun, who had done Stargate for Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin, who did Independence…

— Brent Spiner

“That’s my second rule of life,” Dan said. “There’s always a guy named Joe.”

— Jude Watson

One of my all-time favorite country singers is a guy named Conway Twitty.

— Blake Shelton

“His name is Christian,” he calls back. “Can you believe that? We came all this way so Clara could save a guy named Christian.”…

— Cynthia Hand

“Let me guess, you’ve wanted to build your own ark ever since you learned about the guy you were named after?”

— Emily Wing Smith

“Izzy, Axl, Slash—and Duff,” she said. “What kind of names are those?” “Well, there is a guy named Steven.”

— Duff McKagan

I went to school with a guy named Truxton. He and I played football together, and he knocked me out once because he's bigger…

— Henry Bromell

I design all my own clothes with a guy named Jonathan Logan. He works with everyone from Marilyn Manson to Usher.

— Sisqo

I would actually prefer a guy named Tony, but I'll take the statue.

— Kathy Griffin

“This guy named Ian that I met at school. He wants to go to the DMV with me." She hands me a plate to…

— Carrie Jones