Asparagus is the serpent of the vegetable world.

I kind of feel for the vegetable world - the vegetarian world. It's almost as if people look at them like aliens or foreigners.

— Roy Choi

“When things (in the vegetable world) have displayed their luxuriant growth, we see each of them return to its root.”

— Lao Tzu

The word 'vegetable' has no precise botanical meaning in reference to food plants, and we find that almost all parts of plants have been…

— Charles Heiser

“Sometimes I still get the urge to stuff asparagus up my nostrils, even though I don't like the way it makes my pee smell.”

— Jarod Kintz

“He was a vegetable, so trying to change his mind was fruitless.”

— Jarod Kintz

You know, when you get your first asparagus, or your first acorn squash, or your first really good tomato of the season, those are…

— Mario Batali

Romesco with asparagus is simple and brilliant.

— Anonymous

“keep bees and grow asparagus. listen to the wind instead of the politicians, make up your own stories and believe them if you want…

— Miriam Waddington

The attorney general will not cast aspersions on my asparagus.

— Louie Gohmert

(on asparagus) Europeans of the Renaissance swore by it as an aphrodisiac, and the church banned it from nunneries.

— Barbara Kingsolver

I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the Day: Cream…

— Ellen DeGeneres

“As quick as boiled asparagus!”

— Robert Graves

Respecting the dignity of a spectacular food means enjoying it at its best. Europeans celebrate the short season of abundant asparagus as a form…

— Barbara Kingsolver

I revere the memory of Mr. F. as an estimable man and most indulgent husband, only necessary to mention Asparagus and it appeared or…

— Charles Dickens

Some people are like ants. Give them a warm day and a piece of ground and they start digging. There the similarity ends. Ants…

— Hal Borland