If you push your brother down the stairs, he will become your step brother. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Dating your exes again are just like shopping at your own garage sale. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When gays hack into their boyfriend's Facebook account, do they change the status to, I'M STRAIGHT AND I LOVE EATING PUSSY!? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Don't forget to tell everyone how you hate Mondays, because we were all wondering how you feel about them. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Some hoes only meet the parents because they gotta walk pass the living room. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I followed you on TWITTER because I'm secretly in love with you and I'm hoping this will help you realize that you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I love helping people getting what they want. Today I overheard a girl saying I'd die for spicy mc burger so I… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WIFE, A woman who can be labelled intelligent when she sees through her husband -- she's understanding when she sees him through; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Had a virtual friend once. But all he did was tweeting all day. Also, his name was Virtual Friend. Man, what was… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you send me abusive mentions, I will star it & then retweet your tweets to show you how my twitter life… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If two people are arguing & one person says, You know what... Just sit back & enjoy. Trust me that argument is… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Told my mom, I can become the next Hitler if I drop out of school. She laughed hysterically for 2 hours. I'm… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
LOVE, The most slippery word in the human language -- used by knaves to seduce, by fools for comfort, and by most… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share