When there are no women on the tour it can get awful and ugly - constant horrible jokes and gross behaviour. It… — Evan Dando Copy Share Image
“Second star to the right-" "-and straight on till morning? Yeah, I've heard that one before. Lit of the Ancient Homeworlds 101…” — Linnea Sinclair Copy Share Image
Jokes are one of the things that bind the culture. If you can't have jokes about everybody in society and if one… — Mark Steyn Copy Share Image
Jokes about my surname aren't a big deal at all. In fact, that's what jokes are meant for - you laugh and… — Manushi Chhillar Copy Share Image
It was a somber place, haunted by old jokes and lost laughter. Life, as I discovered, holds no more wretched occupation than… — Malcolm Muggeridge Copy Share Image
Maybe it's because I have too much pride or self-respect, but I thought, 'Why does a guy who has thinning hair and… — Paul Giamatti Copy Share Image
I like things that are immature and offbeat and bizarre. Random jokes. Weird stuff. And stupid. Stupid is the highest compliment a… — Andy Samberg Copy Share Image
We all joke about Congress but we can't improve on them. Have you noticed that no matter who we elect, he is… — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
The art world is the biggest joke going. It's a rest home for the overprivileged, the pretentious, and the weak. And modern… — Banksy Copy Share Image
In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup,… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
If you have the personalities down, you understand them and identify with them; you can stick them in any situation and have… — Bill Watterson Copy Share Image
Kuwait - they live like kings. The poorest person in Kuwait, they live like kings. And yet, they're not paying. America makes… — Donald Trump Copy Share Image
What I don't understand is these people who go on the street wearing riding clothes, and they have never been on a… — C. Z. Guest Copy Share Image
I always put these pert jackanapeses out of countenance by looking extremely grave when they expect that I should laugh at their… — Lord Chesterfield Copy Share Image
Robin Williams is great; it's just like having a conversation when you're doing a scene with him really. It's just so relaxed… — Freddie Highmore Copy Share Image
2 snakes on FB chat: snake1: fusss snake 2 :fusss . snake1: fusss fusss fusss snake2:fussss fusss fusss . snake1: fussss fusss… — Prateek Jain Copy Share Image
I know that's not the right accent, but I can't do the right accent. It's either the wrong accent or another Octomom… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
I don't mind personal insults, but when you insult the jokes that I tell you're insulting Fred Allen, Bob Hope, Burns and… — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
So size does matter from what I heard only 3.5 inches to make a girl happy... Your probably like WTF are you… — Kevin McCarty Copy Share Image
Every week for me was the same audience, and every week they heckled me. The better I got at comedy, the better… — Felipe Esparza Copy Share Image
“But very quickly they all became grave again: for, as you know, there is a kind of happiness and wonder that makes… — C.S. Lewis Copy Share Image
We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' creme brulee. That's just a joke, for you in the media. — Ann Coulter Copy Share Image
My persona is most importantly just to communicate the material in a way that is most funny and meaningful in the moment.… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I am not so secretly a comedian. I write a lot of my own material if you've seen videos I've done. I… — Laura Benanti Copy Share Image
The Comedy Central CDs combined with the TV specials are what led to my stuff being traded and passed around, and a… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
Boy: I would do anything for you, Girl: Like what? Boy: Anything Girl: Jump off the bridge, Boy: Bye, mom is calling — Oksana Serdyuk Copy Share Image
I got kind of scared when I thought they wanted me to do something... I didn't want to be naked on the… — Dolly Parton Copy Share Image
I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite. You see the trouble is… — Les Dawson Copy Share Image
There were always jokes about Hillary Clinton channeling Eleanor Roosevelt, but Eleanor Roosevelt was really instrumental at the UN, and would want… — Madeleine Albright Copy Share Image
When you have a cast and crew of people who make it light hearted and crack jokes, and break treats, and understand… — Jill Scott Copy Share Image
Every time I get happy the Nana-hex comes through. Birds turn into plumber's tools, a sonnet turns into a dirty joke, a… — Anne Sexton Copy Share Image
Every comedian comes to a fork in the road where they have to decide if they're going to make jokes about other… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It is always easy in life to make a joke on the serious thoughts than take on joke seriously in its thoughts… — Anuj Somany Copy Share Image
The government, the state, they're just objects of jokes rather than serious consideration. I can't possibly take them seriously. — Joseph Brodsky Copy Share Image
The joke that I make is that there are instances on the TV series that happen to me, - except on Sex… — Candace Bushnell Copy Share Image
You can trust a Neil Simon script. Every dot. Every dash; that pause means something. He takes all the jokes out, practically. — Hector Elizondo Copy Share Image
Sexual harassment legislation feels unfair to men because if they sued over an ethnic joke, or over a woman discussing pornography or… — Warren Farrell Copy Share Image
My first lessons in comedy, how to construct a joke, I learned from Eileen Brennan, who had unbelievable timing. — Rob Lowe Copy Share Image
I'm not allowed to make a joke. It is a bit unfair how I'm treated. I thought it was a joke. I… — Andy Murray Copy Share Image
