I'm very proud of being Jewish. It means I have a good work ethic, and you get Jewish humour and you're allowed… — Daniel Radcliffe Copy Share Image
Evolution has programmed our brains to find two things particularly interesting, and therefore memorable: jokes and sex - and especially, it seems,… — Joshua Foer Copy Share Image
Same thing, like my commercials are often times really funny because I tend to find 30 seconds is a really good amount… — Alex Winter Copy Share Image
To such men the desperate and horrible thought has come that perhaps the whole of human life is but a bad joke,… — Hermann Hesse Copy Share Image
I like to hold the microphone cord like this, I pinch it together, then I let it go, then you hear a… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Comedians dissect jokes all the time. Comedians are beautiful structuralists. But ultimately it's an athletic endeavor. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I like the rough impersonality of New York ... Human relations are oiled by jokes, complaints, and confessions-all made with the assumption… — Bill Bradley Copy Share Image
Whether a man chooses to tell the truth in long sentences or short jokes is a problem analogous to whether he chooses… — Gilbert K. Chesterton Copy Share Image
My parents took me to that I think is just one of those near-perfect comedies is Young Frankenstein. Gene Wilder and Mel… — Doug Benson Copy Share Image
The funny thing is, when I've gone through the relentless editing process, my editor and I are amazed the Mercy Watson books… — Kate DiCamillo Copy Share Image
In stand up every joke is thought about so meticulously, and one word can completely change how the audience responds. You're up… — Ari Graynor Copy Share Image
If I just do everything the opposite of what my dad did, I think that will make things pretty easy. I can… — Derrick Rose Copy Share Image
Once you've heard the joke, it's not funny anymore, but it's the way it's told. And I think that's the same with… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Death," said Akiva. His life was leaving him fast now that he no longer held his wound. His eyes just wanted to… — Laini Taylor Copy Share Image
A belief in God may not be fully within me anymore, but there's still a belief in belief. The high drama and… — Ayana Mathis Copy Share Image
In the two months I had also dated Justin Fellowes, this guy in my Spanish class, though after three weeks we decided… — Deb Caletti Copy Share Image
Here's a tip. If you touch a girl, even as joke, and she pushes you off, leave... her... alone. Don't touch her.… — Jay Asher Copy Share Image
The worst thing ever that you have to explain your joke because I was very disappointed trying to explain why the joke… — Bassem Youssef Copy Share Image
I don't want them hip white people coming up to me and calling me no n - - or telling me n… — Richard Pryor Copy Share Image
I didn't just want to be Frank's daughter who sang Boots. I take my music very seriously and studied very hard. It's… — Nancy Sinatra Copy Share Image
I was pretty locked up emotionally as a kid - my family situation was tumultuous. But I was extroverted. So when I… — Lindsay Wagner Copy Share Image
Anybody can make jokes. But unless they come from conviction, and there's truth in them, you haven't nailed it. They aren't as… — Dan Jenkins Copy Share Image
I think of a piece, and then people who are competent fabricate it. But lately I've started finger painting, which probably should… — Jenny Holzer Copy Share Image
Before doing my first open mic, I was sitting in the back watching all these comedians banter back and forth and fire… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
When I was governor, if I told a joke in front of the press - I learned. I would go, "That was… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
After 70, a woman is like Tibet: Beautiful, with a mysterious past andthe wisdom of the ages. An adventurous spirit and a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Yeah, Silver and his math are jokes, because math has a liberal bias. After all, math is the reason Mitt Romney's tax… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
People are making these jokes about ours being the PC 'Snow White,' where it's like, yeah, it is - because it needed… — Rachel Zegler Copy Share Image
In one decade, women had gotten more protection against offensive jokes in the workplace than men had gotten in centuries against being… — Warren Farrell Copy Share Image
So, great. This is Camp…what do you call it? Camp Fish-Blood?” Aphros frowned. “I hope that was a joke. This is Camp… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
I definitely script things out. I definitely write things down and try to write jokes. Often, they're terrible. I often write terrible,… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I enjoy darker sardonic wit more than knock-knock jokes. I spent the first healthy chunk of my career playing all-American, pleasant, average,… — Neil Patrick Harris Copy Share Image
The joke was that President Bush only declared war when Starbucks was hit. You can mess with the U.N. all you want,… — Chris Kyle Copy Share Image
I joke that I reached the bimbo trifecta when I came to Fox News! In being a former Miss America, being blonde… — Gretchen Carlson Copy Share Image
I was feeling guilty in the beginning; it was frustrating to be successful when a lot of my friends weren't. Also, I… — Cindy Sherman Copy Share Image
It's the nature of cable news that we [TV hosts] do a lot of clipping and quoting of other broadcasts and outlets,… — Chris Hayes Copy Share Image
It's funny... you can make fun of AIDS or Haiti, but if you make fun of some starlet in Hollywood's looks? That's… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
The people that become the biggest jokes are people who do not change. They stay the way they were in the past.… — Corey Feldman Copy Share Image
I love hanging around folks that love to crack jokes and pay their bills lol, and must love Baskin Robbins lol ctfu — Joe Collins Jr Copy Share Image
I think any decent comedy worth its salt has to have heart, otherwise it's just a bunch of jokes. I think people… — Tom Bennett Copy Share Image
![“It's the nature of cable news that we [TV hosts] do a lot of clipping and quoting of other broadcasts and outlets, sometimes to make a narrative point, sometimes to make a political one, and sometimes just to make a joke.” quote by Chris Hayes](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/016/chris-hayes-2208_cable_it-s-the-nature-of-cable-news-that-we-tv_1499687.jpg)
