We humans are not born alone; joining and being active in a club whose members share your passion for ideas and get… — Richard Lederer Copy Share Image
It's a joke to think that anyone is one thing. We're all such complex creatures. But if I'm going to be a… — Alanis Morissette Copy Share Image
What I don't like today is, to put it coarsely, the phony Hasidism, the phony mysticism. Many students say, "Teach me mysticism."… — Elie Wiesel Copy Share Image
It is by vivacity and wit that man shines in company; but trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon. — Lord Chesterfield Copy Share Image
Sardar: What is the name of your car? Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'. Sardar: Oh, what a… — ZhatsPrincess Copy Share Image
My reputation as a ladies' man was a joke that caused me to laugh bitterly through the ten thousand nights I spent… — Leonard Cohen Copy Share Image
When I hit the scene, there was Billy Connolly and Max Boyce. It was all mother-in-law and Irish jokes, and we broke… — Jasper Carrott Copy Share Image
We realised that it was important to embrace this popcorn logic, that it works, that it's funnier when you fire 20 rounds… — Simon Pegg Copy Share Image
I don't find the same things funny that many other people seem to find funny. I don't really respond to sex jokes… — Nicolas Cage Copy Share Image
And writing comedy and it really taught me how to kind of like craft jokes, it sounds like weird but really focus… — Nicholas Stoller Copy Share Image
I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted… — Joan Rivers Copy Share Image
The repeat run of Fawlty Towers drew bigger audiences than ever and deservedly so. Statistical surveys reveal that only the television critic… — Clive James Copy Share Image
Sometimes when my fans come up to me, they think it's going to be entertaining, like I'm going to tell jokes or… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
Little girl asks her grandma: Grandma, can you show me a magic trick? Grandma answers: I can't dear, but I'm sure your… — Sharlene05 Copy Share Image
What is the universe? Is it a great 3D movie in which we are the unwilling actors? Is it a cosmic joke,… — Heinz Pagels Copy Share Image
He started to touch the mechanism under the keyboard, then pulled his hand back with a snap. "Ah," he said. "Must deactivate… — Rachel Caine Copy Share Image
Sometimes we have to actually say, I think you're really funny, but none of your jokes are going to make it on… — Rob Corddry Copy Share Image
When you get off stage, the audience should know a little bit about you. Not where you are from, but how you… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
For now, we assume that self-evolving robots will learn to mimic human traits, including, eventually, humor. And so, I can't wait to… — Lance Morrow Copy Share Image
One day I asked my heart - What is Love? Heart Replied - See don't ask me Questions which are out of… — Raghav Singh Copy Share Image
Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
At bottom, to be colored means that one has been caught in some utterly unbelievable cosmic joke, a joke so hideous and… — James A. Baldwin Copy Share Image
At the same time, we can't blame comedians for taking time to learn. Any critic of comedy who believes that he has… — Guy Branum Copy Share Image
I still feel threatened by academics, but my books have a lot of academic in-jokes and everybody assumes I went to university… — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
If you want something to be done you got to do it for yourself is not an excuse to master bate some… — Mathew Brakett Copy Share Image
She had something down there twice as big as mine. That's why I say you better watch where you stroke, cause it… — Gary B.B. Coleman Copy Share Image
I think when people watch a lot of artists, they're expecting this showiness, and I'm cracking jokes with people. I'm heckling back.… — Caitlin Rose Copy Share Image
I'm against eating a human being alive - I don't do it. Somebody might make cannibalism jokes and laugh it off like… — John Maus Copy Share Image
I really get a little bit confused by all this "angry angry angry" talk when all I do is tell jokes and… — Aaron McGruder Copy Share Image
Lying contains the same hostile elements as a practical joke in that the 'victim' ends up looking foolish in his own eyes… — Sue Grafton Copy Share Image
All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from… — Alan Moore Copy Share Image
“Most unintelligent or foolish people do not regard themselves as that; they regard themselves as not-that-intelligent or not-that-wise.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I'd worked with Marlon [Brando] a couple of times, and he was a practical joker. He was far more interested in getting… — Johnny Depp Copy Share Image
Zen people love Buddha so tremendously that they can even play jokes upon him. It is out of great love; they are… — Rajneesh Copy Share Image
Thinking up jokes is easy. The hard part is trying them out on stage, because you never know if they're funny until… — Emo Philips Copy Share Image
It’s a basic rule of humor that a joke is always at somebody’s expense. Really good jokes, however, tend to be at… — Richard Kalvar Copy Share Image
The IPCC - and all the mainstream media and environmental extremists who cite it uncritically - really have become a joke in… — Joseph L. Bast Copy Share Image
I always assumed that at some point I would have to quit making jokes, get a real job and do something meaningful… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I joke around sometimes and say that the DP [director of photography] is like a shrink for the director, but there's some… — Reed Morano Copy Share Image
![“I'd worked with Marlon [Brando] a couple of times, and he was a practical joker. He was far more interested in getting jokes out than getting the words out. We laughed all the time.” quote by Johnny Depp](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/1c9/johnny-depp-658_brando_i-d-worked-with-marlon-brando-a-couple-o_2173762.jpg)
![“I joke around sometimes and say that the DP [director of photography] is like a shrink for the director, but there's some truth in there.” quote by Reed Morano](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/323/reed-morano-7427_cinema_i-joke-around-sometimes-and-say-that-the_1600758.jpg)
