“His jaw was set, telling me I should back off. Unfortunately, being a gobby cow meant I couldn’t.” — Kyra Lennon Copy Share Image
Men think wiles charming unless they find out your charms are wiles. — Tyne O'Connell Copy Share Image
Writing humour certainly involves pain. A sitcom is 6 months of writing pain! — Miranda Hart Copy Share Image
“I focused, rather embarrassingly, on his chest which was rising and falling slowly. I left teeth marks!” — Kyra Lennon Copy Share Image
“Oliver, calm down!” said Fred, looking slightly alarmed. “We’re taking Hufflepuff very seriously. Seriously .” — J.K. Rowling Copy Share Image
“Skul-man!' he exclaimed as he rushed forward to shake his hand. 'Last I heard you were trapped on a dead world overrun… — Derek Landy Copy Share Image
I try to be smart with my comedy. Generally, it devolves into bathroom humour. I describe my comedy as, 'I have the… — Jason Priestley Copy Share Image
“There was a man called Chaumette, scruffy and sharp-featured. He hated the aristocrats and he also hated prostitutes, and the two things… — Hilary Mantel Copy Share Image
“Do me a favor, doc?" "Anything, Captain ." "Stop italicizing the word 'Captain' when you say it." "Go easy on the fourth… — Howard Tayler Copy Share Image
“-I’m a girl, I’m his friend and I’m attractive too, so don’t just ignore me like I was a pile of squid… — Andrew James Pritchard Copy Share Image
“I'm capable—" "Three hours after we met, you sold yourself into slavery and then died." Well, yes, it sounded bad when he… — Ilona Andrews Copy Share Image
“Victor Vigny: A monkey glances up and sees a banana, and that's as far as he looks. A visionary looks up and… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“I was taught never to make a threat unless you are prepared to carry it out and I am not a fan… — David Thorne Copy Share Image
“My mortgage isn’t getting any cheaper and I can’t run that Ferrari on faith alone," Reverend Jones said. "Don’t get me wrong,… — Mark Jackman Copy Share Image
“Do not demean yourself by stating the ridiculous," Grimalkin replied smoothly. Just because my species is vastly superior does not mean you… — Julie Kagawa Copy Share Image
“Due to budget constraints I've rewritten the script, condensing all four of the Twilight Opuses into one epic screenplay. We'll shoot it… — Lola Salt Copy Share Image
“You need not treat me like a child, sir. I am perfectly capable of navigating this staircase on my own." He snorted.… — Karen Witemeyer Copy Share Image
“Around 11 P.M., unable to concentrate on his work or even watch the news, he had started to wonder if this was… — Richard Castle Copy Share Image
“It might have interested Newt to know that, of the thirty-nine thousand women tested with the pin during the centuries of witch-hunting,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
There is a certain artificial polish, a commonplace vivacity acquired by perpetually mingling in the beau monde; which, in the commerce of… — Washington Irving Copy Share Image
“But neither could compare with the gargantuan natural edifice that was the mountain upon which Nachtstürm Castle rose. It was a mountain… — Emily C.A. Snyder Copy Share Image
“Wow! My partnerships are multiplying like bunnies on Viagra.” — Darynda Jones Sixth Grave on the Edge Copy Share Image
I really admire medical people. They have a great sense of humour, and they just have to get on with it. — Neve McIntosh Copy Share Image
“He who is jealous is better off not dating someone who is bisexual.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Momentarily forgetting how wind works, Lex tried spitting at him. This failed” — Gina Damico Copy Share Image
Humour is ahead of everything creatively. I think if things aren't humorous, they are just crap. — Roisin Murphy Copy Share Image
“Something tells me we're not in Kansas anymore" "You did not just say that” — Morgan Matson Copy Share Image
“Other married people have lived together and hated each other. Why shouldn't we? We may forget even to hate.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“A sturdy hold, but I think there's something up with the material.” — Pete Sortwell Copy Share Image
“One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Every single person is a fool, insane, a failure, or a bad person to at least ten people.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Fat people are funny … until obesity pays your loved one a visit.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I consider myself something of a raconteur. I have a rather audacious sense of humour. — Sylvester Stallone Copy Share Image
“If I looked like him,” Tara said. “I’d want to have sex with myself. All the time.” — Jill Shalvis Copy Share Image
