Funny Quote by Green Monk

I ain't drunk, officer, I just fell getting out of my car.

— Dead Kennedys

No officer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!

— Anonymous

Officer , I swear to drunk Im not God!

— Hemant Smarty

Cop: Ma'am, could you please step out of the car? Me: I'm kinda drunk, why don't you just get in.

— Anonymous

When I'm drunk I tell the cops the fires lit themselves I swear it, they seem to never beileve me though

— Mike Campbell

No officer, there is no blood in my alcohol system.

— Anonymous

Some officers do so much to try and get at you.

— Da Brat

Officer, I can't even say the alphabet backwards when I'm sober...

— Anonymous

No officer, I didn't see you in my rear view...my eyes haven't left my phone for at least the past 5 miles...

— Anonymous

Officer, this guy is not waiting around for me... so you better shoot me or help me but decide now!

— Jack Bauer

Officer to drunk boy : How high are you? Drunk Boy: No officer, its Hi! How are you?

— Anonymous

Ofcourse I'm going to drive, I'm to drunk to walk.

— Kiara Leigh