Humour Quote by Diane Messidoro

“Lay a paw on my little girl and you will be a three legged Lassie, got it?”

— Quinn Loftis

“I noticed a white tag poking out like a tail where it should’ve been smooth spandex. “Your pants are on inside out, beautiful.” But…

— Nicola Rendell

“Blindfold yourself. I have a surprise.” “Did you wash this?” She sniffed and wrinkled her nose. “It’s crusty.” “Did you wash it when you…

— Nicole Archer

“Good luck explaining to God that you used to spank one of his heavenly beings." Mom gave a startled laugh. "Sophie!" "What? You did.…

— Rachel Hawkins

“You don’t want to hurt Cameron’s car, now do you? She didn’t mean to hit you.” As she spoke to the huge animal, she…

— Marie Force

“When we arrived, my sisters pulled the wheelchair out of the trunk and placed it next to the car door. They opened the door…

— Noah Galloway

“...(plush toy not taxidermy)...”

— JillianNoSoul

“How could you not be amused by a moose that had a crush on your sister-in-law? With the doors and windows open, they could…

— Marie Force

“Yes I am sure I am Super Woman now add more Spanx to the spandex in my suit please ;)”

— Kim Cormack

“I swear, if you touch me, I’ll go Lorena Bobbitt on you.” Lorena Bobbitt? Why does that sound—oh my God, the lady that chopped…

— Molly McAdams

“Now, I’ll admit, he’s nothing of which I was ashamed, but these girls were not only acting is if I was going to take…

— Amalie Silver

“I was revisiting the whole black spandex cat burglar idea. Maybe you could sneak out under cover of darkness, shimmy down a rope from…

— Donna Kauffman