« All Says Quotes · Jay Leno's Page
Says Quotes by Jay Leno
- In business news, chocolate maker nestle is buying Jenny Craig. Well, that says it all you need to know about the war on obesity, doesn't…
- Astronomers have discovered a planet that is twice the size of earth and made of diamonds. President Obama says the planet may be inhabited by…
- A survey says that American workers work the first three hours every day just to pay their taxes. So that's why we can't get anything…
- Donald Trump says he’s President Obama’s worst nightmare. That’s not true. Having to make a decision is Obama’s worst nightmare.
- A top geneticist at Stanford says human intelligence is declining. You know what that means? We are seeing Congress at its smartest and most effective…
- The White House says that the unemployment rate is good news because it means more people are looking for jobs. More good news like that,…
- The IRS says it's been getting death threats since the health care bill passed because the IRS is going to be the ones in charge…
- Mitt Romney is predicting that as president, he will create 12 million jobs in his first term. Well, President Obama says a Romney presidency would…
- In Chicago some anti-Mitt Romney protesters told reporters they're being paid to protest. They said they're being paid by Democrats to stand outside and chant…
- After saying the jobs bill is paid for, President Obama now says that it will be paid for by raising taxes over 10 years. I…
- A new study says that working fewer hours can slow global warming. So you know what that means? President Obama's economic policy is also his…
- The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They…
- If you're a car salesman, and someone says "This is a terrible car, I'm not buying it," it doesn't mean they hate you. They just…
- A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give…
- I went into McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." And the girl behind the counter says, "Would you like fries with that?"
- George W. Bush says he spends sixty to ninety minutes a day working out. He says he works out because it clears his mind. Sometimes…
- The Kinsey Institute says gay men have bigger sex organs. Hence the origin of gay pride.
More Says Quotes
- There's no rule, no law, no regulation that says you can't come back. So I have every right to come back. — Lance Armstrong
- Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around his or her neck that says, 'Make me feel important.' Not… — Mary Kay Ash
- People from different parts of the world can respond to the same story if it says something to them about their own… — Chinua Achebe
- How much time he saves who does not look to see what his neighbor says or does or thinks. — Marcus Aurelius
- The Constitution is government's stop sign. It says, you - the three branches of government - can go so far and no… — Michele Bachmann
- Shockingly, a University of Pennsylvania study says the number of young people addicted to gambling - largely due to increased exposure to… — Spencer Bachus
- Everybody's journey is individual. If you fall in love with a boy, you fall in love with a boy. The fact that… — James A. Baldwin
- I'm a registered Independent. But my brother says it's obvious that I'm a Republican sympathizer. Once I get in the voting booth,… — Stephen Baldwin