Santa Quotes

345 Santa quotes by 272 unique authors

We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we are learning about Santa Claus; but our ideas… — Karen Armstrong
Santa Barbara is a paradise; Disneyland is a paradise; the U.S. is a paradise. Paradise is just paradise. Mournful, monotonous, and superficial though it may… — Jean Baudrillard
Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year. — Victor Borge
Work takes me away from my wife, Sue, and my life in Santa Barbara. — Jeff Bridges
I don't really care what people tell children - when you believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy, one more fib… — Julie Burchill
Nobody shoots at Santa Claus. — Samuel Butler
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. — George Carlin
I work with a place in Santa Monica called Phase IV. My doctor recommended them to me when I started losing weight. They help people… — Drew Carey
Let's be naughty and save Santa the trip. — Gary Allan
Santa is our culture's only mythic figure truly believed in by a large percentage of the population. It's a fact that most of the true… — Chris Van Allsburg
He was a parade all by himself, a burst of dazzle and jingle, Santa Claus drinking his whiskey straight and groaning with a bellyache... Babe… — Jimmy Cannon
No viticultural region in America has demonstrated as much progress in quality and potential for greatness as... the Santa Barbara region, where the Burgundian varietals… — Robert M. Parker, Jr.
Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened… — W.C. Fields
You remember when you were a kid growing up, and believed in Santa Claus? There's not much difference between Santa Claus and me today, you… — Bobby Knight
I've had this look for about a year. I usually grow this beard out around Christmas. I like to go to malls dressed as Jesus,… — Marc Maron
When I was a kid out here in L.A., I was homeless, I didn't have any money and I was living in my car. I… — Thomas Jane
A man of fifty looks as old as Santa Claus to a girl of twenty. — William Feather
Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Clause. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who… — Jon Bon Jovi
God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat. — H. L. Mencken
If you ever have to steal money from your kid, and later on he discovers it's gone, I think a good thing to do is… — Jack Handey
No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace is going to shoot Santa Claus just before a hard… — Al Smith
One of the things I had a hard time getting used to when I came to California in '78 was Santa Claus in shorts. — Dennis Franz
Postal officials say that before Christmas they receive tons of letters written to Santa Claus, but after Christmas how few letters of thanks are sent… — Robert E. Lee
A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's still upset. — James Gould Cozzens
The saddest moment in a child's life is not when he learns that Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns that Vince Russo is. — Jim Cornette

Who Wrote These Santa Quotes

272 authors contributed a total of 345 Santa Quotes, led by these top contributors: