« All Mother Quotes · Erma Bombeck's Page
Mother Quotes by Erma Bombeck
- When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no.…
- It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
- My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
- Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she…
- No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there…
- There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it.
- Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went…
- Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
- I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them to do was die in…
- It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have...One pair that see through closed doors. Another in the back of her head...and, of…
- Not everyone is comfortable with the kissing ritual. My husband is one of them. Her refuses to press lips with anyone except his wife, mother,…
- Spend at least one Mother's Day with your respective mothers before you decide on marriage. If a man gives his mother a gift certificate for…
- My mother won't admit it, but I've always been a disappointment to her. Deep down inside, she'll never forgive herself for giving birth to a…
- Know the difference between success and fame. Success is Mother Teresa. Fame is Madonna.
- No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.
- When mothers talk about the depression of the empty nest, they're not mourning the passing of all those wet towels on the floor, or the…
- The art of never making a mistake is crucial to motherhood. To be effective and to gain the respect she needs to function, a mother…
- Mothers are not the nameless, faceless stereotypes who appear once a year on a greeting card with their virtues set to prose, but women who…
- Mother's words of wisdom: Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth!
- Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.
- Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but mothers seem to have a market on…
- Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
- I love my mother for all the times she said absolutely nothing.... Thinking back on it all, it must have been the most difficult part…
- You show me a boy who brings a snake home to his mother and I'll show you an orphan.
More Mother Quotes
- Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. — Aristotle
- My mother is the coolest, most amazing person I know. — J. J. Abrams
- My parents were early converts to Christianity in my part of Nigeria. They were not just converts; my father was an evangelist,… — Chinua Achebe
- Because I am a mother, I am capable of being shocked: as I never was when I was not one. — Margaret Atwood
- Their mothers had finally caught up to them and been proven right. There were consequences after all but they were the consequences… — Margaret Atwood
- Poverty is the mother of crime. — Marcus Aurelius
- Those of us who can remember our childhoods will recall how ardently we relished the moment of the bedtime story, when our… — Paul Auster
- My mother always said I must be part Mongolian because of my lotus-pale complexion and squid-ink black hair. — Diane Ackerman
- It is here, my daughters, that love is to be found - not hidden away in corners but in the midst of… — Teresa of Avila
- I had a father and mother, who were devout and feared God. Our Lord also helped me with His grace. All this… — Teresa of Avila
- There's huge, massive mother ships going up to the Yukon. They've been filmed and are on video. — Dan Aykroyd
- My parents were divorced when I was a young teenager, and I was raised by a single mother after that. So, I… — Michele Bachmann