Joke Quotes
1327 quotes by 1061 authors
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The gods too are fond of a joke.
— Aristotle
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If I can't face my accusers, that's a joke. We did that in medieval times.
— Lance Armstrong
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As the old joke goes, I have all the sins together. I am a woman, a Socialist, separated and agnostic.
— Michelle Bachelet
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I try to do women's-point-of-view comedy. The joke is, 'This is what I think; there's the truth.' I try to think of stuff that's real…
— Roseanne Barr
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Every man who is high up likes to think he has done it all himself; and the wife smiles, and lets it go at that.…
— James M. Barrie
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In life there are always these things happening if you can just get the joke.
— Lynda Barry
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Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.
— Ambrose Bierce
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The joke of our time is the suicide of intention.
— Theodor Adorno
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I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not.
— Lewis Black
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People always joke that 'dog' spells 'god' backwards. They should consider that it might be the higher power coming down to see just how well…
— Linda Blair
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I always joke and say I want to invent a comfortable stiletto and then retire.
— Sara Blakely
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These endless legal challenges that define elections in New York are a joke in this country, and they are the reason why it is so…
— Michael Bloomberg
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Contrary to reports, this boy is not a billionaire or going to be richer than any Beatle... and not just in the sense of money,…
— Bono
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What the joke displays is a switch in perception. This is important in changing the way we think.
— Edward de Bono
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I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about.
— Elayne Boosler
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The humanists' replacement for religion: work really hard and somehow you'll either save yourself or you'll be immortal. Of course, that's a total joke, and…
— David Bowie
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So many guys are so conservative with their hair, and I always joke with all my buddies when they mess with me, and I'll say,…
— Tom Brady
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A symphony is no joke.
— Johannes Brahms
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Housekeeping ain't no joke.
— Louisa May Alcott
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I'm a bit of a worrier, to an extreme. I'll crack a joke, then worry if I've offended someone - even when they're laughing. I…
— Sophia Bush
Who Wrote These Joke Quotes
1,061 authors contributed a total of 1,327 Joke Quotes, led by these top contributors: