Joke Quotes

1327 quotes by 1061 authors

The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
If I can't face my accusers, that's a joke. We did that in medieval times. — Lance Armstrong
As the old joke goes, I have all the sins together. I am a woman, a Socialist, separated and agnostic. — Michelle Bachelet
I try to do women's-point-of-view comedy. The joke is, 'This is what I think; there's the truth.' I try to think of stuff that's real… — Roseanne Barr
Every man who is high up likes to think he has done it all himself; and the wife smiles, and lets it go at that.… — James M. Barrie
In life there are always these things happening if you can just get the joke. — Lynda Barry
Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke. — Ambrose Bierce
The joke of our time is the suicide of intention. — Theodor Adorno
I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not. — Lewis Black
People always joke that 'dog' spells 'god' backwards. They should consider that it might be the higher power coming down to see just how well… — Linda Blair
I always joke and say I want to invent a comfortable stiletto and then retire. — Sara Blakely
These endless legal challenges that define elections in New York are a joke in this country, and they are the reason why it is so… — Michael Bloomberg
Contrary to reports, this boy is not a billionaire or going to be richer than any Beatle... and not just in the sense of money,… — Bono
What the joke displays is a switch in perception. This is important in changing the way we think. — Edward de Bono
I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about. — Elayne Boosler
The humanists' replacement for religion: work really hard and somehow you'll either save yourself or you'll be immortal. Of course, that's a total joke, and… — David Bowie
So many guys are so conservative with their hair, and I always joke with all my buddies when they mess with me, and I'll say,… — Tom Brady
A symphony is no joke. — Johannes Brahms
Housekeeping ain't no joke. — Louisa May Alcott
I'm a bit of a worrier, to an extreme. I'll crack a joke, then worry if I've offended someone - even when they're laughing. I… — Sophia Bush

Who Wrote These Joke Quotes

1,061 authors contributed a total of 1,327 Joke Quotes, led by these top contributors: