« All Funny Marriage Quotes · Rita Rudner's Page
Funny Marriage Quotes by Rita Rudner
- I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend…
More Funny Marriage Quotes
- No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. — Honore de Balzac
- My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact. — Roseanne Barr
- Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. — Joey Adams
- A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle. — Charles Baudelaire
- Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. — Erma Bombeck
- 'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence? — George Carlin
- If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. — Johnny Carson
- The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. — Cher
- Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. — Gilbert K. Chesterton
- It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you… — Agatha Christie
- In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. — Woody Allen
- Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats. — Woody Allen