« All Bed Quotes · Green Monk's Page
Bed Quotes by Green Monk
- If all else fails, get in bed at 8:00pm and watch a bunch of shit on tv.
- How to get Laid: Lay in bed. Wait two hours. Lay becomes past tense!
- He used to think that he was fantastic in bed until he discovered that all his girlfriends suffered from asthma................
- What are you? My Grammar teacher? Stop correcting my Bed speling!
- That dress would look awfully nice on the floor next to my bed...
- Dear alarm clock, It might be you they hit on, but it's me they're sleeping with. Sincerely, bed.
- I always keep a baseball bat under my bed in case someone tries to break in and pitch a no-hitter!
- My girlfriend said she liked to be teased in the bedroom so, last night in bed I told her, Your new glasses look stupid and…
- If it wasn't for my excitement to hate someone new I wouldn't leave my bed in the morning.
More Bed Quotes
- I'm sure most of us remember being a kid and you have all of this endless time where two weeks before Christmas… — Andrea Arnold
- I'm absolutely strict about it. When I land, I put my watch right, and I don't care what I feel like, I… — David Attenborough
- Evil is unspectacular and always human, and shares our bed and eats at our own table. — Wystan Hugh Auden
- A man can do a television interview and roll out of bed 15 minutes before; it's just not the same for a… — Michele Bachmann
- I wake up every morning, look in the mirror and ask, 'Am I a sex symbol?' Then I go back to bed… — Antonio Banderas
- I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as… — Tallulah Bankhead
- The heart of the jealous knows the best and most satisfying love, that of the other's bed, where the rival perfects the… — Djuna Barnes
- Birth control that really works - every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids. — Roseanne Barr
- Remember how you used to be able to feel your bed breathing and the walls spinning when you were a kid? — Lynda Barry
- One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything everynight before you go to bed. — Bernard Baruch
- This life is a hospital in which every patient is possessed with a desire to change his bed. — Charles Baudelaire
- Early to bed and early to rise is a bad rule for anyone who wishes to become acquainted with our most prominent… — George Ade