All Erma Bombeck Quotes
- Given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it... live it...and never give it back. Stop sweating the… Another Shot
- I have a friend who lives by a three-word philosophy: Seize the Moment. Just possibly, she may be the wisest woman on this planet. Friend
- I have finally mastered what to do with the second tennis ball. Having small hands, I was becoming terribly self-conscious about keeping it in a… Already Occupied
- Poached eggs are good, poached animals are not. Animal
- It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line. Amount
- I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded. Carpet
- Success is outliving your failures Failures
- With boys, you always know where you stand. Right in the path of a hurricane. Always Know
- Motherhood isn't just a series of contractions; it's a state of mind. From the moment we know life is inside us, we feel a responsibility… Contractions
- When humor go's, there go's civilization. Civilization
- Kids have little computer bodies with disks that store information. They remember who had to do the dishes the last time you had spaghetti, who… Ago
- Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift… Buy
- Before we sent kids to computer camps and told them they were having a good time, there was imagination among the human species. Among
- It would have been a wonderful wedding - had it not been mine. Been
- It is my theory you can't get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture. All
- It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: THIS WILL VARY… Bernice
- Mother's words of wisdom: Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth! Answer
- Everyone I talked to was a recording-the bank, the elevator, your office, the school, a wrong number. You used to be able to call a… Able
- Men who have a thirty-six-tele vised-football- games-a- week-habit should be declared legally dead and their estates probated. Dead
- I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he… Airports
- I see children as kites. You spend a lifetime trying to get them off the ground. You run with them until you're both breathless. They… Add
- Myths that need clarification: "No matter how many times you see the Grand canyon, you are still emotionally moved to tears." False. It depends on… Brought
- My sister and I never engaged in sibling rivalry. Our parents weren't that crazy about either one of us. Crazy
- Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood. Cleanliness
- A child develops individuality long before he develops taste. Child