“I could write from anywhere, including the moon, provided I had a pencil and not a pen.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Is a picture really worth a thousand words? What thousand words? A thousand words from a lunatic, or a thousand words from… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I want to write a book called, “Son, I’m dying,” where I visualize the day my estranged dad calls me out of… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If pens doubled as bullets, I bet few writers would want to write about war.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Mounting anything on a plaque instantly transforms it from trash into an award. For example, a dry disposable pen goes from junk… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I don’t think anybody’s ever written a song called, “There’s urine on the couch, and the remote control is in the shower.”… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“My asshole smells like a paper mill. Three cheers for being a writer.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’d like to write a screenplay about my grandpa, and I’d like my future grandson to play the part. Talk about a… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Writer’s want to write something that’ll live forever. I don’t. What do I care if my writing lives forever if I won’t?… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“As a storyteller, I appreciate a great tale. As a cat lover, I appreciate a great tail.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“It’s 3:33 am as I’m writing this down on loose sheets of printer paper. I’m in the back office sitting behind the… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Writer’s block, I just drove around it four times. All my favorite writers live there.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I wrote this because someone put a gun to my head and said, “Write.” And do you know how long it takes… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“With my career I want to either make something or make an impact. Writers both make something, and make an impact.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used as a paperweight, for people whose writing isn’t as dense or weighty as mine. ” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“My writing, it’s all I have. Well, aside from my health. And shelter, food, and clothing. Oh, and my cat.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Sometimes I write about the forest, sometimes I write about the trees, and occasionally I’ll write about the lumberjack. Actually, the lumberjack… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’ll write something that’s 111% true. It’ll be so true that it’ll be 100% false.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“For my books, I do everything short of writing my own reviews. Those I do tall.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
