As I’m fond of saying, if you want to find utopia, take a sharp right on money and a sharp left on… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I'm a hardcore libertarian - I want everything legal - but I also believe that you have the right to free association. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Performers have the right to say what they want to, and anyone paying money has the right to accept or reject the… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
When you look at the actual numbers, the number of people who died after 9/11 was greater than the number of people… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Everybody wants clean, safe energy. Some people think nuclear is the way to go. Some people think coal is the way to… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
A lot of older parents worry about being older parents. I hear people say, 'I don't want to be too old to… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I don't want anyone as president who promises to take care of me. I may be stupid, but I want a chance… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I don't want people who are in poverty, in pain, or suffering, to suffer because it's for their own good and they… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I like movies that are scary, but I don't want them to be dirt dumb. I want a movie that gets my… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I don't want everyone to read anything; I like us all reading different books. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
If there's something you really want to believe, that's what you should question the most. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I get along so much better with fundamentalist Christians than I do with wishy-washy liberals, who want everyone to get along. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Technology adds nothing to art. Two thousand years ago, I could tell you a story, and at any point during the story… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I don't question things that go against what I believe very much. But boy, the stuff that I really want to believe,… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
You can't believe how pro gay and pro freedom of speech I am. I'm way out beyond anyone on the Left. And… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
If you want to talk about magic, the stuff that blows me away is the stuff that's done close up. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
If you don't pay your taxes and you don't answer the warrant and you don't go to court, eventually someone will pull… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
No one can tell you the rules of 'Celebrity Apprentice.' No one. Donald Trump just does what he wants, which is mostly… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Every nut who kills people has a Bible lying around. If you're looking for violent rape imagery, the Bible's right there in… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Believing there's no God means I can't really be forgiven except by kindness and faulty memories. That's good; it makes me want… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
A famous monk once said, I don't always know what the right thing to do is, my Lord, but I think the… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
The fact that the majority wants something good does not give them the right to use force on the minority that don't… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
If you want to turn out an atheist child, unconditional love constantly is a good way to do it. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
“What I have a problem with is not so much religion or god, but faith. When you say you believe something in your heart… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I intend to do the Penn & Teller show until they pry my cheesy magic wand from my cold dead fingers. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
That whole 99% thing, they are all in the 1% of the world. Every one of them pays a cellphone bill that is the… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I will forever stick up for Catholics and Christians in general. With a small number of very horrible exceptions, they do play by the… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I believe very much that the most damning thing you can say about Muslims is that you're afraid to say anything because they'll hurt… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I'm not bothered by the idea of getting old, or I guess you could say by having arrived at old. I was 10 when… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
I'm always surprised when the corporate world does stupid things, because they're often not very stupid in hindsight. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
It's only the losers named 'Dave' that think having an unusual name is bad, and who cares what they think? They're named 'Dave.' — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
The only secret of magic is that I'm willing to work harder on it than you think it's worth. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
Well, it's not really the right word, but freedom is kind of a hobby with me, and I have disposable income that I'll spend… — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
It is really funny to see people that you know acting unpleasantly just because there are TV cameras on. — Penn Jillette Copy Share Image
