WIFE, A woman who can spot a blond hair on her husband's coat from ten feet away but can never see a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Hating "The Great Gatsby" (the novel) is like spitting into the Grand Canyon. It will not be going away anytime soon, but… — Joyce Carol Oates Copy Share Image
Tweeting is the new social addictions that causes everyone to wonder who someone is talking about — Taelor Chardae Copy Share Image
Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Third party auditor is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Politician: Whoever shakes your hand before elections and your wallet after elections. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I was on Twitter right in the first couple months that it was out. — Andrew Keenan-Bolger Copy Share Image
Don't Take It Seriously * When the HAIRDRESSER says, Do you want it teased or blown? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Be careful not to start a company that really belongs as a feature of another company, like the 25 Twitter URL shortener… — Aaron Patzer Copy Share Image
WIFE, A great comfort during her husband's troubles -- those, that as a bachelor, he would never have had; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you say you're in a bad place, and everything is coming your way, then chances are you're a woman, and you're… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“If a cigarette butt in the bottom of a beer bottle had a voice it would be the voice of Phil Tufnell.” — Telford Vice Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, is when a husband can determine when his wife comes to the end of one argument and begins the next; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
SOCIALISM: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember... I KNOW… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Jesus could get on Twitter and be like 'fear not, child. I know for a fact that your going to heaven!' and… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Between the three, Facebook is literally everyone I've ever shaken hands with at a conference or kissed on the cheek at Easter.… — Dennis Crowley Copy Share Image
Actual warning printed on the bottom of a package of Tesco's Tiramisu dessert : Do not turn upside down. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
