I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Is old age really so terrible? Not if you've brushed your teeth faithfully. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I can't minimize the terror factor. As you get older you get more and more frightened because the terrible indignities of old… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I'm a terrible musician. While the band members are great, I'm tolerated and affectionately regarded because I do movies, but if I… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I think that the tendency for most people is to fall back on a comic interpretation of things because things are so… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
"Boy, the food at this place is really terrible." The other one says, "Yeah, I know; and such small portions." Well, that's… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Human existence is a brutal experience to me... it's a brutal, meaningless experience - an agonizing, meaningless experience with some oases, delight,… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
If I was to see any of my films now I would feel, oh god you know it's awful I could do… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I never thought I was doing anyone a favour by bringing children into the world. With people as cruel to each other… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
There are drawbacks in being famous too, but you can live with those. They're not life-threatening. If the paparazzi are outside your… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I'm sure there are people in Hollywood, whose main drive in film is to make money, who will feel that any use… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I think Hollywood has gone in a disastrous path. It's terrible. The years of cinema that were great were the '30s, '40s,… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night. I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people.… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
During the course of the year a number of ideas just come up automatically. I could be walking down the street. Or… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I feel that humor, just like Fred Astaire dance numbers or these lightweight musicals, gives you a little oasis. You are in… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I've never felt Truth was Beauty. Never. I've always felt that people can't take too much reality. I like being in Ingmar… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says, "Boy, the… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“True, science has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the moon, and yet when a man of… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate it, and… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What has gotten into you lately? Save a little craziness for menopause! — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I enjoy the making of the film and it's something for me to do. If nobody ever comes to my films, if people don't… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
