He doesn’t look very smart,” Diesel said. “He’s not even giving me the finger.” “Can monkey’s do that?” Hal asked. Carl gave… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Yeah, I like that idea. Maybe he'll shoot at us again. I was hoping someone would shoot at me today. That was… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I always wanted to eat with a Negro,” Grandma said. Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney- assed old… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Babe,' Ranger said. 'Do something with her.' And he disconnected. I called Ranger back. 'No,' I said. 'And I need information on… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off," he said. "I'm not in the mood to compromise. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Bob had a dog buscuit stuck to his head. "How does he always get food stuck to him?" I asked Morelli. "I… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I got out of the elevator and confronted Mr. Wexler. “Killing is wrong.” “We kill chickens,” Mr. Wexler said. “We kill cows.… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
One of the men gave Butch a bunch of volts with a stun gun. The Rangeman didn’t move fast enough, and Butch… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Fine. Let Ranger get someone else. Trust me, you don't want to be out looking for a parking place on Sloane in… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
He reached out, opened the glove compartment, and took out a gun. It was a Smith & Wesson .38 five-shot special. It… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
My father hired you to protect me," Ahmed said, "not to go off chasing men." Grandma leaned forward, keeping her eye on… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I went to the door, and Gary tried hard not to notice I was blue. He looked at his feet, and he… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
The dog ran into the kitchen, stuck his nose in Grandma's crotch, and snuffled. Dang," Grandma said. "Guess my new perfume really… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
You're not looking for a partner," Ranger said. "You're looking for an enforcer. You hate to run. You must be worried about… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
[Ranger] "How's your mental health?" he asked. "I heard about Soder." [Stephanie] "I'm rattled." "I have a cure." Oh, boy. He put… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Give me the gun." Ranger said. I extracted the gun from my pants and handed it over. Ranger held the gun in… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Oh, for God's sake," I said. "Just give me the stupid thing." I took the panic button and stuck it into my… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
This is war,' I yelled through the door. Lucky for me,' Morelli said. 'I give good war. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Shirley's gonna be pissed," Gazarra said. "She hates when I get shot." To my recollection, the only other time Gazarra was shot… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Morelli smiled. "It could have been Jenny Ragucci. That makes much more sense. I had good luck with sluts." I looked over… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Ranger locked eyes with me. "Please," he said. Tank and Hal were goggle-eyed. They weren't used to "please." I wasn't used to… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I thought you wanted to date other women?" "I didn't want to date other women. We decided in the heat of the… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“His pager beeped, and he looked at the readout. “I have to get back to Deal. Do you have any secret weapons in your… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
You gonna take the case?" It's not a case. It's a missing person. Sort of." You're gonna have a devil of a time finding… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Are we fighting?" I asked Morelli. "No. Were discussing." "Are you sure?" "Am I yelling?" Morelli asked. "Is my face purple? Are the cords… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“changed expression. Wariness, maybe. I felt a body move so close it was skimming my own, and a warm hand protectively settled at the… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. "this is it", he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep."this car… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“Ranger was waiting. He was dressed in black slacks, a form-fitting black T-shirt, and a black blazer.” — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
Way back before the 'Alex Barnaby' series was first published, we were talking with Dark Horse then about making it into a graphic novel… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“He wears jeans, untucked shirts, and a Glock 19, and he has a big shaggy dog named Bob.” — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
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