This specter of the female politician, who abandons her family to neglect for the sake of passing bills in parliament, is just… — Frances Power Cobbe Copy Share Image
Men...we spend nine months trying to get out of a vagina, and the rest of our lives trying to get back in. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Once you've heard the joke, it's not funny anymore, but it's the way it's told. And I think that's the same with… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I want to tell my jokes. I want to have time with my children. I want to entertain people. And at one… — Dave Chappelle Copy Share Image
I think it's worth trying to be a mother who delights in who her children are, in their knock-knock jokes and earnest… — Ayelet Waldman Copy Share Image
It is an old baseball joke that big-inning baseball is affirmed in the Bible, in Genesis. "In the big inning, God created... — George Will Copy Share Image
Put in every joke that's not a dud and then let's just start pulling the ones that work the least. You're just… — Jason H. Moore Copy Share Image
Nurse: A woman that wakes you up in the middle of the night to give you sleeping pills. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, then we can be good friends. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Most unintelligent or foolish people do not regard themselves as that; they regard themselves as not-that-intelligent or not-that-wise.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Being raised Catholic myself, I think people who are Catholic tend to carry a lot of guilt. It's almost a joke. — Linda Cardellini Copy Share Image
I don't like to argue with females, I'm simply explaining why I'm right.... — Kevin McCarty Copy Share Image
Call me Meier," Goring said, but he did not pause to explain the joke . — Philip Jose Farmer Copy Share Image
There were plenty of times some writers would make some kind of stupid joke to each other and then it was on… — Jon Glaser Copy Share Image
Thank you,” Simon said. “It’s a joke, Isabelle. He’s the Count. He likes counting. You know. ‘What did the Count eat today,… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
“I was a lazy reader as a kid. One nutrition label on a box of Cap’n Crunch and I’d have to take… — M.J. McGuire Copy Share Image
Usually the intention of the artistic effect is too sophisticated for most people to understand, sort of like a joke that they… — Billy Corgan Copy Share Image
I like to joke that I probably hold the world record for rejection letters. Yes, the truth is that I was fed… — Ashwin Sanghi Copy Share Image
Coming up with a funny joke is like falling in love: It can hit you any time, anywhere. Having said that, the… — Emo Philips Copy Share Image
I am a crazy online shopper. My husband always jokes, 'Another box arrived!' Airplanes used to be my sanctuary for reading books,… — Lisa Ling Copy Share Image
Yes, yes, I know all the jokes. What else could I have expected at Highbury? But I went to Chelsea and to… — Nick Hornby Copy Share Image
I used to think it was so funny that plankton was married to his computer, but now I realized that's probably my… — Sponge Bob Copy Share Image
