Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him.... — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Normally if I met a guy who was unemployed and illiterate who hadn't bathed in a couple of weeks, I'd be standing… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
It's very difficult to stay angry when a room full of bald guys in orange robes start giggling. Buddhism. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Like most Beta Males, he didn't realize that being a good guy was not necessarily an attraction to women. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
...One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
It's about average for us. Behavior always draws more than survey. We're the sexy ones,' Nate said with a grin. Amy snorted.… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Love them all," said Renoir. "That is the secret, young man. Love them all." The painter let go of his arm and shrugged. "Then,… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I hope you are not here to ask me to do my bawdy business- the monkey has a nosebleed and the circus, sir, is… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“The night was crisp and the stars shone with a cold blue light like loneliness or infinity.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Abby Von Normal - And I'm like, "Don't change the subject, Kung Pao, what I want to know is if you're ready to spend… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“…turning your ankle hurts like hell, even if you're a superhero.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
