Firsts Quotes by Dennis Miller

10 Firsts quotes by Dennis Miller

Miller’s quick wit lands on the idea of beginnings with a punchy edge. This compact collection of ten remarks gives a glimpse of his humor‑laden perspective on those initial moments.

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I don't need to be born again. I got it right the first time.

Dennis Miller

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I'm sorry, those pictures from the Abu Ghraib. At first, they, like infuriated me, I was sad. Then like, a couple days…

Dennis Miller

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After 7 years of marriage, I am sure of 2 things: First, never wallpaper together and second, you'll need 2 bathrooms .…

Dennis Miller

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Lotto fever hit New York again this week, and like the old saying goes, 'You gotta be in it to win it'...…

Dennis Miller

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The soldiers kill suicide bombers. Think about that. When a guys whole thing in life is to kill himself and you get…

Dennis Miller

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Ouch! And Marino goes down quicker than his Boonesfarm-infused sister in the back of my '68 Cutlass on our first date after…

Dennis Miller

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Only man is a narcissistic enough species to think that a highly evolved alien life force would travel across billions and billions…

Dennis Miller

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I don't know what I think of George W. Bush when he first got in, but I've grown fond of the man,…

Dennis Miller

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Campaign analysts say that Dean has produced the most innovative web site in this year's presidential race. I particularly like today's blog,…

Dennis Miller

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And finally, and most importantly, the next time we go to war, don't give a specific reason for the war that the…

Dennis Miller

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Laughter is one of the great beacons in life because we don't refract it by gunning it through our intellectual prism. What makes us…

Dennis Miller

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It takes zero politically correct people to screw in a lightbulb because they are perpetually in the dark.

Dennis Miller

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Drop the veneer periodically and be like "OK, I'm an imperfect human. Let's try to get through this."

Dennis Miller

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I'm left on a lot of things. If two gay guys want to get married, I could care less. If a nut case from…

Dennis Miller

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American's could be any more self absorbed if they were made of equal parts water and paper towel.

Dennis Miller

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Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place.

Dennis Miller

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I think abortion's wrong, but it's none of my business to tell somebody what's wrong, he said. So I'm pro-choice. I want to keep…

Dennis Miller

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Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head.

Dennis Miller

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We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Kucinich's politics are more scrambled than Rod Steiger's dream journal.

Dennis Miller

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Somebody call Janet Reno - I think I just saw Donato dragging Doug Flutie into a locker room closet!

Dennis Miller

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I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person.

Dennis Miller

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