America may be the best country in the world, but that's kind of like being the valedictorian of summer school. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I love this country for several reasons, not the least of which is that I know I'm allowed to hate it if… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I have the distinction of speaking to you from one of the few countries that still has a communist party. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
We should fight to preserve a country where people such as Michael Moore get to miss the point as badly as he… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I preume there are far too many abortions performed in this country. And I also believe that at the end of the… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
The Mexican people I know seem to respect the country in a way that many spoiled brats who were born here don't.… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Trends don't mean anything to me. If I like something, I'll do it. If I don't, I won't do it, and I… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
So who's the big red menace nowadays? Cuba. That's it? I'm sorry, but it's hard to whip up any us against them… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Yeah, this country's founding fathers are a bunch of dead rich white men, but they did set things up so you could… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Laughter is one of the great beacons in life because we don't refract it by gunning it through our intellectual prism. What makes us… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
It takes zero politically correct people to screw in a lightbulb because they are perpetually in the dark. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Drop the veneer periodically and be like "OK, I'm an imperfect human. Let's try to get through this." — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I'm left on a lot of things. If two gay guys want to get married, I could care less. If a nut case from… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
American's could be any more self absorbed if they were made of equal parts water and paper towel. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I think abortion's wrong, but it's none of my business to tell somebody what's wrong, he said. So I'm pro-choice. I want to keep… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Dennis Kucinich's politics are more scrambled than Rod Steiger's dream journal. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Somebody call Janet Reno - I think I just saw Donato dragging Doug Flutie into a locker room closet! — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image