Comedy Quotes by Kevin Nealon

I learned how to draw from being bored in school. I would doodle on the margins of my paper

— Kevin Nealon

I'd been doing some light-beer commercials for Budweiser and Coors, and I was doing stand-up comedy. I wanted to get into the acting world,…

— Kevin Nealon

I think people really appreciate clever commercials, as do I. I think they're very entertaining. You just have to wade through all the garbage.…

— Kevin Nealon

If you want a transcript of tonight's program, get a pen and write down everything I said.

— Kevin Nealon

I really like to read when I'm eating - 'The New York Times' or the 'Wall Street Journal,' paper version.

— Kevin Nealon

I've noticed a surge when I go out somewhere, or if I'm doing stand-up.

— Kevin Nealon

I play a lot of sports. I'm not real good at any of them. I'm above adequate.

— Kevin Nealon

When I first began doing TV pilots, my expectations were high. I didn't understand that world. So when 'Weeds' took off, I was so…

— Kevin Nealon

As a comedian, you're kind of like a blues musician; you have to live a little bit.

— Kevin Nealon

Roxanne came along in '86, when I was doing a lot of stand-up. I auditioned for the movie, and of course I was a…

— Kevin Nealon

I became a vegetarian after I became aware of factory farming and slaughterhouses and the torture and inhumane handling of all these animals.

— Kevin Nealon

I have a severe addiction to 'Angry Birds.' I always tell myself, 'One more game...' But then there's always another and another and another.

— Kevin Nealon

I really enjoyed working on the 2009 film, 'Aliens in the Attic,' because it was shot in New Zealand and I got to visit…

— Kevin Nealon

I tried to read the Bible, I did, but it always felt like a much less awesome Lord of the Rings.

— Kevin Nealon

I don't smoke pot or cigarettes, so inhaling smoke as a non-smoker - it doesn't matter what it is, it's going to make you…

— Kevin Nealon