I'm never going to write fart jokes, because I feel like I have a responsibility to the audience to give them good… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
It's a huge high to be able to earn a nice living doing the thing I love most - making comedy. — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
Really, when people put together the highlight reels of the classic moments from 'Friends,' 'Seinfeld,' 'Cheers,' even 'MASH,' they're full of broad… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
My TV comedy idols are the Charles brothers, who did 'Cheers;' Larry Gelbart, who did 'MASH;' and Larry David, who did 'Seinfeld.'… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
“I've said this before: a lot of people think they're artists because they feel things deeply. You know, we're in a culture now and… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
I'm never going to write fart jokes, because I feel like I have a responsibility to the audience to give them good stuff. I… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
I took a break to take care of a lot of stuff that I'd let go by the wayside for decades. — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
I don't want to be an old man some day and look it up and see some episode of one of the shows I… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
I don't think of myself as a guy who writes for kids, I really don't. I try really hard to write a good, solid… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
We work hard to make a good show and it's exciting to be recognized by a third party. — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
When I was on 'Head of the Class,' 25 million, 30 million people would watch that every night - now a big hit doesn't… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
As everyone who works for me knows, I almost never let the girls wear ponytails on my shows. — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
Kids spend seven hours a day in school, and they have their homework at night. I'm not there to moralize or to teach them… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
I think my shows can draw an audience of 12 million because I ask, 'What can make a 7-year-old, a 17-year-old, a 30-year-old and… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
Right when I moved to L.A., I started writing. I wrote some screenplay. I'm sure it's terrible. But I wrote a screenplay by myself.… — Dan Schneider Copy Share Image
