Comedy Quotes · Page 165

“Learn to find humor in the unending emotional drama the feminine seems to enjoy so much.”

— David Deida

He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.

— Rodney Dangerfield

When life gives me lemons I sell them for drug money

— Anonymous

There is something about laughter that can take away all the darkness.

— Christina Applegate

I think there are opportunities for women in comedies - how zany is up to them.

— Jennifer Aniston

“Wanted: Steel toed Bible thumpers to reach a monster truck mad world.”

— M.J. McGuire

When you bump into your own mom at an orgy, it's hard not to get her to read into certain things.

— Russell Brand

People often ask me how I make things funny. I don't make things funny.

— Richard Russo

Comedians are sometimes resentful of their writers. Probably because it's hard for giant egos to admit you need anyone but yourself to…

— Dick Cavett

I don't deliberately go into comedy or go into indies, but I do deliberately try to keep changing tact, because I think…

— John C. Reilly

The thing is, not everyone is funny, is the reality. That's terrifying! You either have the comedic timing or you don't.

— Melissa Barrera

Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling…

— Bernie Mac

I think my comedy, the put-downs I do to hecklers, are the accumulated bitterness of years of people feeling that it's perfectly…

— Jo Brand

I laugh every day. There are days when my laughs are pretty hollow. Dust comes out of your mouth, and your bones…

— James L. Brooks

[Robert Smigel] is one of the greatest comedy writers in the last 50 years. "TV Funhouse" and Triumph and all those sketches.He's…

— Neal Brennan

I always say, 'Thank goodness 'Wimpy Kid' was a comedy because my singing in that was more humorous than professional.'

— Devon Bostick

The nice thing about 'Futurama' for me personally was that it was a way to honor some of the traditional ideas in…

— Matt Groening

Oh Christ, the exhaustion of not knowing anything. It's so tiring and hard on the nerves. It really takes it out of…

— Martin Amis

“How's your humor? What can you do to have more humorous lines to use in the right place at the right time?…

— Susan C. Young

and I laugh, I can still laugh, who can't laugh when the whole thing is so ridiculous that only the insane, the…

— Charles Bukowski

I am in no way facetious, nor disposed for the mirth and galliardize of company, yet in one dream I can compose…

— Thomas Browne

In comedy, it's not the glamorous, beautiful people that are great at comedy. They're either every man or every woman, they're either…

— Rebel Wilson

“The men laugh at the witty line, but it is not a belly laugh. Beasley's mouth is in a wide smile, but…

— Mumia Abu-Jamal

I am a candid interview and I have a dark and dry sense of humor - a very Canadian sense of humor…

— Michael Buble

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.

— Carol Burnett

If you can make the reader laugh he is apt to get careless and go on reading.

— Henry Green

Writing a comedy track is an art. It isn't as easy as people think. It can make or break a film.

— Vivek

Well, I think my stand-up is often kind of visual. Not like Carrot Top visual, but visual.

— Michael Ian Black

Comedy is the difference between how you see a person and how they see themselves.

— Douglas Coupland

You should never make fun of something a person can't change about themselves.

— Phil Lester /AmazingPhil

“Do not put up with mean people who discourage your laughter.”

— Jim Dines

You know you're a bad joker when you're making some jokes and your friends reaction was 'huh?'

— Anonymous

I'm set up where I make a lot of money doing stand-up, and it's easy.

— Ron White

Today I laugh till my face become red and now gonna cry till my eyes become red.

— Kanishka Dixit

It’s really hard to hate someone for being different when you’re too busy laughing together.

— George Takei

Comedy is so hard; it's so much harder than drama. The pacing of it, the energy of it.

— Josh Lucas

Acting, music, comedy are all just delivery systems to communicate ideas and stories.

— Kyle Gass

My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.

— Jim Gaffigan

My dad was proud of himself when he farted. He sounds like he's strangling a chicken when he farts.

— Carl Barron

“Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Snore, and you'll sleep alone.”

— Marian Phair