Funny SMS / Text Messages

A famous inspirational speaker said:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
Audience was in shock and silence..
He added: "she was my mother"
A big round of applause & laughter!

A very daring husbnd tried to crack this at home
After a dinner, he said loudly to his wife in the kitchen:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
standing for a moment, trying to recall the second line of that speaker

by the time he gained his senses,
he was on a hospital bed,
recovering from burns of boiling water!

Moral: don't copy if u can't paste!

Why student fails ?

WHY STUDENT FAIL
Sundays-52 in a year,Days left 313
Summer holidays 50,Days left 263
8 hrs daily sleep-130 days GONe, Days left 141
1 hr daily playing means 15 days,Days left 126
2 hrs daily for eating means 30 days.Days left 96,
1 hr talking means 15 days.,Days left 81
Exams days 35 days,Days left 46
Eid & Gov holidays 20, Days left 26
Movies,TV at least 25 days,Days left 1
That 1 day is your BIRTHDAY.
Hun banda SALGIRHA waly din bhi parhy?

Who is dear & near friend...

Whos hot... Its U,
Whos
Charming... Its U,
Whos
Sweetest.. Its U,
Whos
Intelligent... Its U,
Whos dear & near friend... Its U
Whos a liar.. Its me

Diff B/W Commerce & Science Questions:

Diff B/W Commerce & Science Questions:
Commerce :
What Is Ur Name?
(10 Mrks)

Science:
What Is Ur Name & Its Origin?
Give Relations &Applied Aspects Along With It'S Logical Significance.
Also Explain With The Help Of Graph.
It'S Upper & Lower Limits.(1+1+1=3 Marks)

Banda Fail Nae Hoga To Kya Top Krega? =P =D

Girl fully exhausted

A young girl after her honeymoon
came fully exhausted and tired,

When her friends asked her what happened?

She replied :
When this 70 year old bastard told me
he has saved a lot from last 50 years,

"I thought It was MONEY"

if sumone calls u crazy

if sumone calls u crazy,dont mind,
if sumone calls u duffer,relax,
if sumone calls u stupid be cool,
but if sumone calls u "cute"
.
.
.
.
lagana thappar os pagal ke monh pe,
mazak ki b koi hud hoti hai

What A Mystery

What A Mystery
A cockraoch is afraid of Rat,
Rat is afraid of Cat,
Cat is afraid of Dog,
Dog is afraid of Man,
Man is afraid of Woman,
And Woman is afraid of
.
.
.
.
.
.
Cockraoch!

Height of Good Luck ...!

Height of Good Luck ...!

Teacher: Hey! Stand up.
Tell me two pronouns.
.
.
.
Student: Who? Me?

Teacher: Very Good, Sit down :D

Can't clear all subjects in 1st attempt...?

Question:
Why most of the engineering students
Can't clear all subjects in 1st attempt..?
?
?
?
Answer:
Smooth roads never make good drivers,
Clear sky never makes good pilots
&
Clearing all subjects in the 1st attempt,
Never makes good engineers.

All girls r beautiful n boys innocent

All Girls Are Beautiful After The Lights Are Switched Off
(Shakespeare)

All Boys Are Innocent Before The Lights Are Switched Off
(Shakespeare'S Wife)

Pillow is like a true love

True Love is like a pillow.
U could HUG it when Ur in trouble.
U could CRY on it when Ur in pain.
U could EMBRACE it when Ur happy.
Want True Love?
Spend Rs.50 buy a Pillow.