Crap Quote by Laurie Notaro Download Open image “I want a man as nice as my retarded dog, but one that doesn't crap on the floor.” — Laurie Notaro ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 2.1 out of 5 (9 ratings) Copy quoteShare Crap Dog Men Nice Retarded Want
A dog, however nice he is, and sweet-tempered, doesn't have much of a range of options. A human being does. — Tenzin Palmo Copy Share Image
I also like men who like dogs. I couldn't date a man who doesn't like my dog. — Kristin Davis Copy Share Image
A dog, I will maintain, is a very tolerable judge of beauty, as appears from the fact that any liberally educated dog does, in… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I love my dog unconditionally, but never the man I'm sleeping with. — Isabel Allende Copy Share Image
“It was the gift that every girl dreams of, to be dead long enough for your parents to realize how meaningless their lives were… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“Sure, I'd like to lose some weight, but a tapeworm is the last way I'd like to do it, except becoming a prisoner of… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“As a result of that experience, I do think all Anthropologies should provide a courtesy volcano just outside their dressing rooms so every woman… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“The lesson here is that a giant cupcake tattoo is typically an indication of two things: (1) Sister go her hands on some crystal… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
My family were staunch believers in physical violence, not automatic violence, and we had a Safeway around the corner, so we never really needed… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“Goddamnit I've never been the "pretty friend..." She's the one who wears the perfect eyeliner, it never gathers like a crowd in her tear… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
I majored in journalism at Arizona State University, where I began writing the columns I write now, but I cannot, in good conscience, refer… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“I just might kill someone in my next job, and I'll be honest here, I couldn't do the time. Really. No way. I couldn't… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“Dr. Bone Specialist came in, made me stand up and hobble across the room, checked my reflexes, and then made me lie down on… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“Asininity was puddling all around me in quantities too vast to soak up. - It Looked Different on the Model” — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“Weddings, I began to understand, were vile, filthy things when they ran amuck.” — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
I think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes your mind… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
When you're the director and the writer, you never have to remember your lines, and there's no one to call you on it. On… — Zach Braff Copy Share Image
There's too many people in seats of power who just haven't got a clue what they're doing. They're bean counters, and it just pisses… — Pierce Brosnan Copy Share Image
Players lose you games, not tactics. There's so much crap talked about tactics by people who barely know how to win at dominoes. — Brian Clough Copy Share Image
I don't take crap from anyone, so that makes people think I'm rebellious. I'm not. I'm just not a pushover. — Kat Dennings Copy Share Image
Don't worry, be crappy. Revolutionary means you ship and then test... Lots of things made the first Mac in 1984 a piece of crap… — Guy Kawasaki Copy Share Image
People say you shouldn't eat carbs, but that's crap. I just try to stay away from white ones. — Marisa Miller Copy Share Image
“I wanted us to have an adventure. Because I love that crap. Because I'm not whatever-her-name-is. I don't think it's oh so hard to… — John Green Copy Share Image
If you think your management doesn't know what it's doing or that your organisation turns out low-quality software crap that embarrasses you, then leave. — Edward Yourdon Copy Share Image
