Philosophy Quote by Jen Kirkman

“Having a silent fart is like getting rid of shit in your life - Politely.”

— Bhawna Kak

“And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank…

— Tina Fey

“Suddenly, the gods have stopped saying yes and have started making really obnoxious farting noises. In my face. With their armpits.”

— Jody Gehrman

“God is omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. He is intricately involved in our lives and for that alone, we should be thankful.”

— Robin Bertram

“Every step, every breath, every second I lived on this earth, I’m thankful for, no matter how fucked up or whacked or hard or…

— Kristen Ashley

“I have a bed and enough to eat and kind people about me. God is still with me. For these things I am grateful…

— Tracy Chevalier

“That is a fart without wind…" in reference to when you can't back up what you say. very funny.”

— Faye Kellerman

“i hang out with war vets in a hospital they will never leave alive.i was out in the garden with the alzheimers and asked…

— ijosephi lowly worm

“And in winter, under my greatcoat, I wrapped myself in swathes of newspaper, and did not shed them until the earth awoke, for good,…

— Samuel Beckett

“God was the God of contentment. That was so. But just then, with Mama smiling so wide, I thought He might just be the…

— Susie Finkbeiner

“Just because you aren’t tucked in nice and cozy in your comfortable little life, doesn’t mean that God has viciously tossed you in over…

— John Michael Hileman

“Mothers were meant to love us unconditionally, to understand our moments of stupidity, to reprimand us for lame excuses while yet acknowledging our point…

— Richelle E. Goodrich