Car Quote by Felipe Esparza

“The police pulled me over and asked me if I have anything illegal in my car. I looked at my cousin and I ran.”

Felipe Esparza

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.1 out of 5 (6 ratings)

More by Felipe Esparza

I started drinking when I was like 15, and by the time I was 19 everybody knew I was an alcoholic. So I would…

Felipe Esparza

Image

I used to work at UPS I got fired for unloading packages into my car.

Felipe Esparza

Image

Rich people bring a lawyer. Latinos and blacks bring their mom.

Felipe Esparza

Image

You write some material, go up on stage and try it out; go back home and throw it in the trash can. And the…

Felipe Esparza

Image

I've got three women in my life: my mama, ex baby mama and my new baby mama.

Felipe Esparza

Image

I gotta lose weight. I got stretch marks on my stomach and I never had a baby. So now when I take off my…

Felipe Esparza

Image

I like to watch French movies with the volume up so my neighbors could think I'm terrorist.

Felipe Esparza

Image

Valentines Day is the Super Bowl of relationships. If you're alone that night you didn't make the cut.

Felipe Esparza

Image

I may not be the best dad but I taught my son how to get free samples at the mall.

Felipe Esparza

Image

While everyone else was saying Trick or Treat my dad was telling us to say Triki Tras.

Felipe Esparza

Image

Every week for me was the same audience, and every week they heckled me. The better I got at comedy, the better the audience…

Felipe Esparza

Image

I listened to my first comedy album in 6th grade. It was Bill Cosby. My brother and I would play it over and over on a Fisher Price record player. A friend in high school also introduced me to Richard Pryor. I wasn't writing material back then, but I would say funny stuff. I was good at making fun of…

Felipe Esparza

Explore all 40 Felipe Esparza quotes

More Car quotes

If you restore a car, and you're making money, then you're doing it wrong.

Jay Leno

Image

I understand that it's the music that keeps me alive... That's my lifeblood. And to give that up for, like, the TV, the cars, the houses - that's not the American dream. That's the booby prize, in the end. Those are the booby prizes. And if you fall for them - if, when you achieve them, you believe that this…

Bruce Springsteen

My embarrassing confession is that my father is a 'Camelot: The Musical' obsessive. So as a child, when we were going to visit relatives…

Chris Chibnall

Image

I don't own designer clothes, or a sports car, or a huge house, but I am seeing the world, experiencing amazing things, and I…

Roz Savage

Image

Television, radio, social media. The 24/7 news cycle plows forward mercilessly on our desks, in our cars and in our pockets. Thousands and thousands…

Joseph Prince

Image

I don't own a yacht or a flashy car. I've always had safe cars because I do so much driving. I don't think I've…

Angela Rippon

Image

I am a horrible visual artist. I can't fix a car, sew, knit, cook, etc. Statistically, there is more I don't do than do.

Carrie Brownstein

Image

I mean, you've kind of got the track down, especially with ovals. The only thing that improves is that when race conditions come, you…

Danica Patrick

Image

I was with Dre when he was just selling tapes. He didn't have a car, a license or a job.

Michel'le

Image

'Melanin Man' was inspired by the words of an Uber driver in L.A. Before I got out of the car he said, 'They're scared of you young man. You're a king and they all know it. They want your culture, your soulful element and your style. You're Melanin Man, a super hero. Be safe out here.' Then I got out…

Masego

The things that don't happen to us that we'll never know didn't happen to us. The nonstories. The extra minute to find the briefcase that makes you late to the spot where a tractor trailer mauled another car instead of yours. The woman you didn't meet because she couldn't get a taxi to the party you had to leave early…

Anita Shreve

“I hate the way you talk to me And the way you cut your hair I hate the way you drive my car I hate it when you stare I hate your big dumb combat boots And the way you read my mind I hate you so much, that it makes me sick And even makes me rhyme I hate…

David Levithan

Browse all 6,850 Car quotes

Car Quote by Felipe Esparza

Related quotes

More by Felipe Esparza

More Car quotes