Humour Quote by Cathy Kelly

“If there were only three Irishmen in the world you'd find two of them in a corner talking about the other.”

— Brandan Araoz Maria

“I am an Irishman, sir." "Irish Irish?" "Yes, sir.”

— Arthur Conan Doyle

“If you ask an Irishman for directions, he might be quick to answer, Well if I were going there, I would not start here.”

— Steve Stockman

A man once asked to shake hands with me, the "greatest Englishman who ever lived." I replied, "F**k off, I'm Irish."

— Spike Milligan

“For you can't hear Irish tunes without knowing you're Irish, and wanting to pound that fact into the floor.”

— Jennifer Armstrong

“Gladstone .. spent his declining years trying to guess the answer to the Irish Question; unfortunately, whenever he was getting warm, the Irish secretly…

— W.C. Sellar

“I don't hate the English and I don't know do I love the Irish. But I love him. I'm sure of that now. And…

— Jamie O'Neill

“A man with an Irish accent could sound wise and poetic and interesting even when he wasn’t.”

— Kate Atkinson

“There's no sense to being Irish unless you know the world's going to break your heart.”

— Thomas Adcock

“A driver had been sent to meet us. He was gray-haired, short, and nimble and introduced himself. "I am Patrick and so is every…

— Sharon Creech

“Do you ever feel that everything would be okay, if only you had an Irish accent?”

— Graham Parke

“But it was always thus with Irishmen. Never, since the start of the world, has one of them taken a woman's sensible advice when…

— Eddie Lenihan