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Whether Americans Quotes by Andy Borowitz

1 Whether Americans quote by Andy Borowitz

A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten.

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Andy Borowitz has 46 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.
Facebook's new relationship status option: "No longer able to interact with actual people"
If you are friends with the wrong people, Google+ autocorrects them
Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot…
Maybe I'm a dreamer, but I wish mental health care was as easy to get as, say, a gun.
All Americans mourn the passing of the author of the Declaration of Independence, George Jefferson.
Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.
Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.

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More Whether Americans Quotes

Popular Whether Americans quotes from across the collection:

The time is now near at hand which must probably determine whether Americans are to be freemen or slaves; whether they are… — George Washington
A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten. — Andy Borowitz
The time is near at hand which must determine whether Americans are to be free men or slaves. — George Washington
People get caught up in asking whether Americans should be going here or there. What it boils down to is the call… — Michael Scott

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