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Sex Quotes by Rita Rudner
- My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin…
- Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
- Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying.
- The closest I ever came to a menage-a-trois was when I dated a schizophrenic.
More Sex Quotes
- There are some forms of religion that are bad, just as there's bad cooking or bad art or bad sex, you have… — Karen Armstrong
- There are two things people want more than sex and money... recognition and praise. — Mary Kay Ash
- Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right. — Isaac Asimov
- One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other. — Jane Austen
- I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late start without me. — Tallulah Bankhead
- Remember, sex is like a Chinese dinner. It ain't over 'til you both get your cookie. — Alec Baldwin
- Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you thought of nothing else if you didn't have it and thought of other… — James A. Baldwin
- I wake up every morning, look in the mirror and ask, 'Am I a sex symbol?' Then I go back to bed… — Antonio Banderas
- I'm as pure as the driven slush. — Tallulah Bankhead
- Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once. — Tallulah Bankhead
- Life is wasted on the living. — Douglas Adams
- I'm just curious, who's more fit to raise a child? A loving committed same-sex couple or an unmarried 15-year-old with no income… — Ellen Barkin