« All New Quotes · Conan O'Brien's Page
New Quotes by Conan O'Brien
- Al Gore announced he is finishing up a new book about global warming and the environment. Yeah, the first chapter talks about how you shouldn't…
- By the power invested in me by the state of New York and the Universal Life Church, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You…
- In a new interview, Newt Gingrich says he cheated on two of his wives because he was too consumed with love for his country. Yeah,…
- Promoting his new book, President Bush visited the headquarters of Facebook. Unfortunately, he spent the whole visit on Farmville, clearing brush.
- A new poll shows that Tiger Woods' popularity has dropped from 85 percent to 33 percent. President Obama's popularity is also at 33 percent, but…
- The New Oxford Dictionary has declared Sarah Palin's word 'refudiate' to be the 2010 Word of the Year. Palin was honored and said she would…
- There's a new children's book that's coming out that features Sarah Palin as a hero. I don't want to give away the ending, but we…
- In Sarah Palin's new book, she says when she first laid eyes on her future husband, she said out loud, 'Thank you, God,' which is…
- President Obama made a big speech. He welcomed the members of the U.N. General Assembly to New York, and he said, 'I'd like to encourage…
- A new report just came out that says President Obama has mentioned Jesus Christ in more speeches than President Bush did. Can you believe that?…
- People all over the world now are following our election. And according to a new international poll that just came out, I think this came…
- A new survey reveals that women would rather give up sex than give up the remote control for the TV. Men, on the other hand,…
- The results of a new study are out this week saying that New Jersey is one of the most livable states in the country. The…
- In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani.
- According to a new survey, 40 percent of adults in Mexico say they would move to the United States if they got a chance. The…
- Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be…
More New Quotes
- The new always happens against the overwhelming odds of statistical laws and their probability, which for all practical, everyday purposes amounts to… — Hannah Arendt
- Stopping leaks is a new form of censorship. — Julian Assange
- Even in New York, there are a lot of very attractive girls pedaling around. That just happens to be one of the… — Paul Auster
- The alliance should agree... to an effective NATO role against the new threats presented by international terrorism and weapons of mass destruction. — Jose Maria Aznar
- In the holy city of Mecca, violence of any kind was forbidden. From the moment they left home, pilgrims were not permitted… — Karen Armstrong
- Research is creating new knowledge. — Neil Armstrong
- I thought the attractions of being an astronaut were actually, not so much the Moon, but flying in a completely new medium. — Neil Armstrong
- I think it's important as a filmmaker, as any person working in the arts, that you've got to try new stuff and… — Darren Aronofsky
- The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...' — Isaac Asimov
- The most extraordinary thing about trying to piece together the missing links in the evolutionary story is that when you do find… — David Attenborough
- I think every age lives in a blend of technology so there's always older ones mixed in with newer ones, and when… — Margaret Atwood
- Life is too short to spend hoping that the perfectly arched eyebrow or hottest new lip shade will mask an ugly heart. — Kevyn Aucoin