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Humorous Quotes by Will Rogers
- If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there
- Every Harvard class should have one Democrat to rescue it from oblivion.
- The Democrats are going to change the name of the Hoover Dam. That is the silliest thing I ever heard of in politics . .…
- There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income.
- I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
- The 1928 Republican Convention opened with a prayer. If the Lord can see His way clear to bless the Republican Party the way it's been…
- If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
- I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
- I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.
- People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.
- The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they have to live off each other, while the Republicans, why,…
- Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in.
- When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
More Humorous Quotes
- Wit is educated insolence. — Aristotle
- The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
- It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. — Aristotle
- People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. — Isaac Asimov
- I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them. — Isaac Asimov
- Meanwhile, fears of universal disaster sank to an all time low over the world. — Isaac Asimov
- O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- Give me chastity and continence, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. — Tallulah Bankhead
- No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. — Honore de Balzac
- It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty… — Honore de Balzac
- Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. — Douglas Adams