« All Funny Quotes · Fran Lebowitz's Page
Funny Quotes by Fran Lebowitz
- No one earns $100 million. You steal $100 million.
- To me, O'Hara is the real Fitzgerald.
- By the time everyone catches up with you, you're bored.
- If you read a lot, nothing is as great as you've imagined. Venice is - Venice is better.
- As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
- You're only as good as your last haircut.
- Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
- I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
- Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
- When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.
- Polite conversation is rarely either.
- Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.
- It's much easier to write a solemn book than a funny book. It's harder to make people laugh than it is to make them cry.…
- There's no such thing as advice to the lovelorn. If they took advice, they wouldn't be lovelorn.
More Funny Quotes
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- I'm literally open to any medium that will have me. — J. J. Abrams
- We must all make peace so that we can all live in peace. — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- These are the fifties, you know. The disgusting, posturing fifties. — Hannah Arendt
- Age appears to be best in four things; old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and… — Francis Bacon
- I find a lot of things kind of funny and I often say what's on my mind, and then get nine texts… — Kate Beckinsale
- I used too be the girl that would be soo happy to walk into the classroom and say'guess who just walked in… — Jasmine
- To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would be enough… — Hannah Arendt