Drunk Quotes

1185 quotes by 870 authors

I have a responsibility, and it's something that I did wrong, and if I could personally apologize to every single person that has lost a… — Nicole Richie
Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators. — Will Rogers
There's a joke in economics about the drunk who loses his keys in the street but only looks for them under the lightposts. When asked… — Christina Romer
Statistics are used much like a drunk uses a lamppost: for support, not illumination. — Vin Scully
Grant stood by me when I was crazy, and I stood by him when he was drunk, and now we stand by each other. — William Tecumseh Sherman
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy. — Frank Sinatra
When we started I wasn't the singer. I was the drunk rhythm guitarist who wrote all these weird songs. — Robert Smith
It is funny the two things most men are proudest of is the thing that any man can do and doing does in the same… — Gertrude Stein
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? — W. Clement Stone
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. — Dylan Thomas
I don't drink, and I don't smoke. It's a personal preference. My mom has never drunk or smoked. I look up to my mom. — Ashley Tisdale
There's no question that we need tougher drunk-driving laws for repeat offenders. We need to take a lesson from European countries where driving isn't a… — Jesse Ventura
Don't you know there ain't no devil, it's just god when he's drunk. — Tom Waits
Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic's best friend! — Gerard Way
If the world were a bar, America would currently be the angry drunk waving around a loaded gun. Yeah, the other people in the bar… — Wil Wheaton
Work is the curse of the drinking classes. — Oscar Wilde
The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober. — William Butler Yeats
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. — Henny Youngman
My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City? — Henny Youngman
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team,… — Frank Zappa

Who Wrote These Drunk Quotes

870 authors contributed a total of 1,185 Drunk Quotes, led by these top contributors: