Claus Quotes

153 quotes by 127 authors

More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good. — Linda Sunshine
Many practitioners think there is some giant balance scale, where someone is keeping track, like Santa Claus, and that will determine your allotment of presents.… — Frederick Lenz
Guys who dress up like Santa Claus, see, and give presents away do it because when they was young they must have did something bad… — George Seaton
"The only reason some of us are not exiled or thrown into prison is simply because we do not preach as fervently and as sternly… — Oliver B. Greene
... Once you're safely in the mall, you should tie your children to you with ropes so the other shoppers won't try to buy them.… — Dave Barry
The title of that great Christmas song was 'Boogie Woogie Santa Claus,' and no one ever heard of it. — Patti Page
HOLLY KING is a symbol of the waning forces of Nature... The Holly King is depicted as an old man in winter garb. His head… — Raven Grimassi
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark. — Dick Gregory
When I was 21 years old, I had a job playing Santa Claus in a shopping centre in Sacramento. I was rail thin, so it's… — Tom Hanks
A good many things go around in the dark besides Santa Claus. — Herbert Hoover
I actually share her view and understand her frustration when any government attempts to ban secular symbols like Santa Claus or Rudolph the Red Nose… — Steve Israel
Obama's gonna play Santa Claus with the minimum wage. He's got no successes to brag about. He cannot talk about a robust job market. In… — Rush Limbaugh
The idea of God as a fatherly figure who looks down on us and worries about how we're doing or takes sides when we have… — Dave Matthews
At the heart of every really good Christmas movie is the threat, I suppose, to Christmas. Something is wrong with Christmas, in all of these… — James McAvoy
Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven. — H. L. Mencken
I see Santa Claus and Joseph Smith and Luke Skywalker as the same person. — Trey Parker
Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it - Santa Claus was a man, therefore God has to be a man. — Patti Smith
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my… — Shirley Temple
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. — Steven Wright
CALVIN: This whole Santa Claus thing just doesn't make sense. Why all the secrecy? Why all the mystery? If the guy exists why doesn't he… — Bill Watterson

Who Wrote These Claus Quotes

127 authors contributed a total of 153 Claus Quotes, led by these top contributors: