All P.J. O'Rourke Quotes
- Now for good or ill, California is the place where trends tend to be set in Western civilization - if civilization indeed it is. California,… America
- The Greenpeace booth at all the rock and roll shows nowadays are akin to the old sorcerers who used to stand in the middle of… Akin
- We won't dispassionately investigate or rationally debate which drugs do what damage and whether or how much of that damage is the result of criminalization.… Criminalization
- Stay away from girls who cry a lot or who look like they get pregnant easily or have careers. Careers
- In the past a man was expected to give his seat on a bus to a woman. Today it would be much more courteous for… Bus
- When a couple decides to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having a party and telling all their friends. This is not… All
- There's not a woman in the book, the plot hinges on unkindness to animals, and the black characters mostly drown by Chapter 29. Animal
- Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals when their cheery effect is needed. Birthday
- If I give up drinking, smoking, and fatty foods, I can add ten years to my life. Trouble is, I'll add it to the wrong… Add
- Actually, there is no way of making vomiting courteous. You have to do the next best thing, which is to vomit in such a way… Amusing
- How much fame, money and power does a woman have to achieve on her own before you can punch her in the face? Achieve
- That doesn't mean that you should just sit back and just let accidents happen to you. No, you have to go out and cause them… Accidents
- The only time a bachelor's bed is made is when it's in the factory. Bachelors
- The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin. The… Bachelor
- The Constitution is an equally forthright piece of work and quite succinct ... giving the complete operating instructions for a nation of 250 million people.… Camry
- A dugout is much superior to a conventional manufactured canoe because you can get soaking wet without bothering to capsize it. Boat
- This is the most elaborate and luxurious method of convincing others that you can cook. Take everybody out on your yacht until they're green in… Boat
- I don't think I'll ever be a real boat reporter. My Rolex isn't big enough. Big
- If the wind is blowing like stink and everything is working right, a twelve-meter sailboat can go eleven and a half or twelve miles an… Blowing
- The America's Cup is like driving your Lamborgini to the Gran Prix track to watch the charter buses race. America
- There are a lot of mysterious things about boats, such as why anyone would get on one voluntarily. Anyone
- In Western Australia they don't even know how to make that vital piece of sailboating equipment, the gin and tonic. Australia
- Never steal anything so small that you'll have to go to an unpleasant city jail for it instead of a minimum-security federal tennis prison. Advice
- A girl who is really pretty - whether she wraps herself in an abayah, a nun's habit, or the front hall rug - never wraps… Beauty
- The very existence of the bicycle is an offense to reason and wisdom. Bicycle