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From Quotes by P.J. O'Rourke
- Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying. (Put an empty cigarette pack on your nose for a horn and…
- The old woman was not only ugly with the ugliness age brings us all but showed signs of formidable ugliness by birth - pickle-jar chin,…
- Writing this book required an enormous amount of help from friends. To them goes the credit. I'll take the money.
- We're told cars are wasteful. Wasteful of what? Oil did a lot of good sitting in the ground for millions of years. We're told cars…
- Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults as rotten SOB's given to fistfights, gunplay, and other mayhem.…
- Health care is too expensive, so the Clinton administration is putting a high-powered coporate lawyer - Hillary - in charge of making it cheaper. (This…
- When government does, occasionally, work, it works in an elitist fashion. That is, government is most easily manipulated by people who have money and power…
- Our democracy, our culture, our whole way of life is a spectacular triumph of the blah. Why not have a political convention without politics to…
- Wealth is, for most people, the only honest and likely path to liberty. With money comes power over the world. Men are freed from drudgery,…
- When I became a man, I put away childish things and got more elaborate and expensive childish things from France and Japan.
- Stay away from girls who cry a lot or who look like they get pregnant easily or have careers.
- Government isn't a good way to solve problems ... [G]overnment is concerned mostly with self-perpetuation and is subject to fantastic ideas about its own capabilities.…
- Think of what big governments have gotten up to in this century : not one, but two world wars, the gulag, the holocaust, aerial bombing…
- This country is so urbanized we think low-fat milk comes from cows on Nutri/System weight-loss plans.
- West Germans are tall, pink, pert and orthodontically corrected, with hands, teeth and hair as clean as their clothes and clothes as sharp as their…
- You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.
- Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good…
- There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.
- Distracting a politician from governing is like distracting a bear from eating your baby.
- There's a certain kind of behavior in the Arab world that, to me, resembles the way young men behave when there is no significant influence…
More From Quotes
- No cause is left but the most ancient of all, the one, in fact, that from the beginning of our history has… — Hannah Arendt
- Haiti, Haiti, the further I am from you, the less I breathe. Haiti, I love you, and I will love you always.… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- Whenever u get hurt from those people whom u love most don't blame them, fault is not their its your fault that… — Anurag Prakash Ray
- Sometimes people who want to understand Haiti from a political perspective may be missing part of the picture. They also need to… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. — Aristotle
- We construct a narrative for ourselves, and that's the thread that we follow from one day to the next. People who disintegrate… — Paul Auster
- Total loyalty is possible only when fidelity is emptied of all concrete content, from which changes of mind might naturally arise. — Hannah Arendt
- From heresy, frenzy and jealousy, good Lord deliver me. — Ludovico Ariosto