All Andy Rooney Quotes
- Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it. All
- I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. Act
- I've learned .... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss. Learned
- I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere. Bitterness
- I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes. Closer
- Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? 'Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right… Answering
- the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. Aging
- I am not retiring. Writers don't retire. Writers never stop writing. Inspirational
- I don't differentiate much, except in degree, between people who believe in religion from those who believe in astrology, magic or the supernatural. Astrology
- We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't… All
- Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn't have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout. Any
- I'd be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn't believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each other but I… Accept
- Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always Keep
- If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances… Amounts
- I've learned ... that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them. Fall
- The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the… Any
- Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it. Avoid
- The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned how to cook. Biggest
- For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40 +, there is a balding, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with… Balding
- Democrats (I think to myself) are liberals who believe the people are basically good, but that they need government help to organize their lives. They… Acquisitive
- Anyone who lies golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens. Anyone
- Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is… Been
- When a politician mentions God half a dozen times in a speech, it's to appropriate for his campaign the name God. He's suggesting that God… Appropriate
- If you smile when you are alone, then you really mean it. Alone
- I don't like chocolate chip cookies. Chip