What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
None of us can have as many virtues as the fountain-pen, or half its cussedness; but we can try. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It is not worth while to try to keep history from repeating itself, for man's character will always make the preventing of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If I were going to construct a God I would furnish him with some ways and qualities and characteristics which the Present… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A sincere compliment is always grateful to a lady, so long as you don't try to knock her down with it. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The humorist who invented trial by jury played a colossal practical joke upon the world, but since we have the system we… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Heaven knows insanity was disreputable enough, long ago; but now that the lawyers have got to cutting every gallows rope and picking… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
....try the mustard, - a man can't know what turnips are in perfection without mustard. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
You try to tell me anything about the newspaper business! Sir, I have been through it from Alpha to Omaha, and I… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There's nobody for me to attack in this matter even with soft and gentle ridicule-and I shouldn't ever think of using a… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never could do anything with figures, never had any talent for mathematics, never accomplished anything in my efforts at that rugged… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
We can secure other people's approval, if we do right and try hard; but our own is worth a hundred of it,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I will gradually drop this subject of graveyards. I have been trying all I could to get down to the sentimental part… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Writing is the easiest thing in the world.... Just try it sometime. I sit up with a pipe in my mouth and… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion--several of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
That is an editor. He is trying to think of a word. He props his feet on a chair, which is the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I am trying to get the hang of this new fangled writing machine, but I am not making a shining success of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It has taken a weary long time to persuade American Presbyterians to give up infant damnation and try to bear it the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A dream...I was trying to explain to St. Peter, and was doing it in the German tongue, because I didn't want to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It is hopeless for the occasional visitor to try to keep up with Chicago-she outgrows his prophecies faster than he can make… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that but the really great make you feel… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Begin with the determination to succeed and the work is half done already. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
