Toilets Quotes · Page 14

For me, the test of a good office is how clean its toilets are.

— Sudha Murty

The chili I ate made for an explosive bathroom experience. I don't know how to put this delicately, but I missed the…

— Seth Green

“No thanks,’ said Harry. ‘The poor toilet’s never had anything as horrible as your head down it – it might be sick.’…

— Anonymous

People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

— Billy Connolly

I like to play pranks on my girlfriend, you know, keep things fresh for me, make me laugh, you know? She hates…

— Anthony Jeselnik

There were other stories and other names. Second Base Stace, who had breasts in fourth grade and let some of the boys…

— Stephen Chbosky

What a relief. I didn't have to check the toilet for anything or the light bulbs or the phone. It was just…

— Julia Roberts

The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys…

— Eoin Colfer

So it just wasn't in my house. Anywhere, I looked like I knew about the toilet.

— Sarah Dessen

I’ll flush a copy of my bill down the toilet. You should be getting it in a couple of days.

— John Swartzwelder

Mothers born on relief have their babies on relief. Nothingness, truly, seems to be the condition of these New York people. They…

— Elizabeth Hardwick

Most of the time he [Marlon Brando] sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper.

— Rex Reed

If we all had what we wanted to eat... We'd have inflation in the toilet paper industry.

— Jim Thompson

Philosophers of genius, children, and the people are equally wise - because they ask equally foolish questions. Foolish to a civilized man…

— Yevgeny Zamyatin

There is nothing like scrubbing toilets for a living to make you question the choices you have made in life.

— Raegan Butcher

Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet…

— Joey Bishop

Is it possible that my sons-in-law will do toilets? If we raise boys to know that diapers need to be changed and…

— Anne Roiphe

Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'

— Bill Maher

I don't think the press has done a very good job dealing with government spending.The Defense Department with the $9,500 toilet seat,…

— Dave Barry

Teddy said it was a hat, So I put it on. Now dad is saying, "where the heck's the toilet plunger gone?

— Shel Silverstein

I wrote about Freud and the process of sublimation, which is when you learn to stop breast-feeding, or stop going to the…

— Bat for Lashes

Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.

— Zach Braff

It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly…

— Janet Evanovich

Don’t get married in a house where there is no toilet,

— Jairam Ramesh

Clean water is only as far away as the nearest tap, and there are taps everywhere. There's a faucet everywhere. But the…

— Matt Damon