He had threatened my parents. I had to remember that. Still, it was really hard to stay mad at a wounded naked… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
She still wasn't convinced. "So, if you were a guy, would you be into me?" "Hon, if I were a guy, I'd… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
What's your specialty? Oh, you know. Madness. Mayhem. Debauchery. And even with all that going for me, I can still make a… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
After a geological epoch passed in which single-celled organisms evolved into talk show hosts, Mr. Coffee was still holding out on me. — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. "Do you still like me?" "I never liked… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
Garrett must have sensed I was awake. "Hey Detective," he said to Uncle Bob, who was now trudging across the grating toward… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
Felt my heartbeat falter, hesitate, then stumble awkwardly forward, tripping on the next beat, then the next, faster and faster until each… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
He’d actually hit me! It didn’t matter that hitting me wasn’t really like hitting a regular girl and I’d be completely healed… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
You still owe me a million dollars." I'd presented him with a bill for proving his innocence and getting him freed from… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
He bombarded me with words, of all things, apparently clueless to the fact that the predawn hours rendered me incapable of coherent thought. — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
I have three words for you," EMT Guy said. "Possible internal bleeding." I turned back to him. "Don't you think if I was bleeding… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
God I loved Sammy. I’d considered marrying him, but his wife got upset when I asked for his hand. — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“Oh, my god, I don't know. What do you want?" "You," he said, his voice lowering an octave. "I want you, Dutch, body and… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“If ever there was a time to carry a flashlight, it would definitely be at night.” — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
In three hundred feet, turn right," Darth Vader said. The Darth Vader. I felt like we were friends now. Like I could tell him… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“The asshole slipped Peggy a five-spot to bring him his burger first. Never trust a man with a penis.” — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“I reported to work the next morning looking like something the cat dragged in, half eaten yet somehow still alive.” — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
