I believe that everyone should be treated as an individual. Women should be treated equally in the right to vote, sure. But… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
You should laugh everywhere you can find even the slightest glimmer of humour. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I'll defend child pornography, how about that? What's wrong with seeing some child pornography? What if you watch child pornography because you… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
The reputation of generosity is to be purchased pretty cheap; it does not depend so much upon a man's general expense, as… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
There are some occasions in which a man must tell half his secret, in order to conceal the rest; but there is… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
All illegal narcotics are medicinal. Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it, with little or no side effects if… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
They should raise the alcohol age to 60, so at least you'd have something to look forward to at this point. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
There should be no such thing as a vice law. Every vice is only a bad habit, and the punishment is inherent… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I wish the 50 states would break up. Lose the centralised government. More choice. How do you want to live, there's 50… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I believe that everyone should be treated as an individual. Women should be treated equally in the right to vote, sure. But… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Your sins are what make you fantastic. It's what makes you alive. You should wear your sins on your sleeve. You should… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Invent new drugs, that's what you should be doing... fight to get new weirder ones... and weirder establishments to do them in. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I had no musical or athletic ability, and I wasn't particularly good looking. Comedy was something I could do for attention. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Jesus died for your sins. I'm doing it for your mere entertainment dollar. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I believe that everyone should be treated as an individual. Women should be treated equally in the right to vote, sure. But if Im… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
They say 'life is precious'. To who? To you, when you're young and you've got a few dollars in your pocket. Tell that to… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
The ultimate act of cowardice is the fat-headed wrestling guy sitting behind the frail kid in math class, clipping him on the ear, saying:… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
There's no such thing as addiction, there's only things that you enjoy doing more than life. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
The whole acting and Hollywood [thing], it's just work to me. Stand-up comedy ruins you so badly for doing television. I don't really need… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
You should laugh everywhere you can find even the slightest glimmer of humour. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Everybody's angry. They've got nothing to be angry at, so they're angry about nothing. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
People who want to kill other people are the last people I want to party with, because I get mouthy when I drink. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Democracy is the worst kind of government, I'm sorry. Would you still call yourself a Christian if they elected a new Jesus every four… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image