My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed; I never knew they worked. — Les Dawson Copy Share Image
I cook mostly vegetarian vegetable and bean stews. Quinoa salads. I make my mother-in-law's recipe for chicken and barley stew all the… — Gail Simmons Copy Share Image
I have a great relationship with my mother-in-law. We're both Leos, we understand each other. — Tori Amos Copy Share Image
I think my mother-in-law is trying to tell me something. She is giving me baby clothes and baby food...Not happening. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Barack Obama's mother-in-law might be moving into the White House with him. Joe Biden was right. Hostile forces will test him in… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
a mother-in-law's praise says more in a woman's favor than anything else in the world. — Caroline Pafford Miller Copy Share Image
They (mothers-in-law) never leave when they say they will. When my mother-in-law visits, the mice throw themselves at the cat, begging to… — Lisa Kleypas Copy Share Image
I can always tell when the mother in law's coming to stay; the mice throw themselves on the traps. — Les Dawson Copy Share Image
The best compliment that has ever been given to me was, I was at the airport one day and a guy came… — Lionel Richie Copy Share Image
The lawyer cabled to his client., yr mother in law passed away in her sleep. Shall we order burial, embalming or cremation?… — Chloe Copy Share Image
I find it beautiful when we're in Italy that everybody sits down at the table together. My mother-in-law is like, 'It doesn't… — Debi Mazar Copy Share Image
“They're horrible little creatures. All snot and smelly feet and pestering questions." "Then why did you go into teaching?" "It was either… — Brian Francis Copy Share Image
“Surely,' I said, 'you don't think that you are going to die because you dreamed you saw your old father; if one… — H. Rider Haggard Copy Share Image
If someone should ask, "how should an Opposition function?" the best answer would be, "in the manner of a traditional mother-in-law who… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Barack Obama said he may negotiate with the Taliban. A lot of people are saying okay, but be careful. But I said… — David Letterman Copy Share Image
“I was thinking of murder, mutilation and dessert like Ignacia Sandoval’s instructions for delectable empanadas made of minced mother-in-law’s tongue (said to… — Sandra Ramos O'Briant Copy Share Image
Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out as Woman Hitler? Coincidence? I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I suppose, mother-in-laws are frightening figures. Especially, more so for mother-in-laws to be. — Sonia Gandhi Copy Share Image
We never make sport of religion, politics, race or mothers. A mother never gets hit with a custard pie. Mothers-in-law-yes. But mothers-never. — Mack Sennett Copy Share Image
Having a great mother in law that you get along with and you KNOW she likes you will motivate you to never… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My mother-in-law was with me during all four of my births and when she was sitting next to me holding my hand… — Patricia Heaton Copy Share Image
Just because you're unemployed doesn't mean you're not doing anything useful. You are, for example, at least keeping your mother-in-law's wit sharp. — Marilyn vos Savant Copy Share Image
When I get married I want a mother in law that will adore me and one that I'll actually like. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The mother-in-laws themselves weren't natural jokes but most comedians used to use that. — Allen Toussaint Copy Share Image
My mother-in-law must be the probation officer I got for the crime I committed of marrying my husband. — Phyllis Diller Copy Share Image
You know you've built a product that can hit the mainstream when your wife, your father, and your mother-in-law can get involved. — Josh Kopelman Copy Share Image
Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock. — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
My wife is the kind of girl who will not go anywhere without her mother, and her mother will go anywhere. — John Barrymore Copy Share Image
We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, "I've decided I want to… — Dave Spikey Copy Share Image
I haven't spoken to my mother-in-law for eighteen months-I don't like to interrupt her. — Ken Dodd Copy Share Image
When you have a wonderful mother-in-law who takes sides with you in squabbles with her own daughter - that's something. — Lou Gehrig Copy Share Image
Pakistan is the sort of place every man should send his mother-in-law, for a month, with all expenses paid. — Ian Botham Copy Share Image
I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in. — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
I have no problem putting my feet up and watching football but my mother-in-law is always doing stuff. — Seal Copy Share Image
You know what's great about having an imaginary girlfriend? Imaginary mother-in-law! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
But I understand that relationship; I understand how the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship has so many conflicts because it's so forced. — Wanda Sykes Copy Share Image
“You see what your mother-in-law hasn’t yet realised is that she’s the one who needs to hold out the olive branch, not… — Karl Wiggins Copy Share Image
“It's funny. I thought she'd live through anything." Charlie said, "Me too. I figured even if there was a nuclear war, it… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“while your mother in law still lives, domestic harmony / is out of the question.” — Juvenal Copy Share Image
“Never say anything on the phone that you wouldn't want your mother in law to hear at your trial” — Sydney Biddle Barrows Copy Share Image
